gjOe in Moggama3 el Ta7reer: Part II

well, madam fat7ya is a typical Egyptian woman.She is veiled, a proud mother of 3 gurls ,a bit chuby, puts on lots of makeup for work, sotaha 3aaly, and betfally elly oddamaha men saso le raso! other than that she is sooo sweet..
madam fat7ya is a manager in an admin. where they help ppl who study travel abroad to get a degree.."be3thaat" and they manage ppl who are here to cope with the egyptian educational institute."wafedeen"
i went to meet madam fat7a as a step towards our graduation project where we want to interview some users of the program-to-be that we are developing.
Mainly it was a questionnare. It should have lasted for 30 to 45 mins but it stretched out to 3 hrs..
madam fat7ya did most of the talking .. the interview was formal but she went out of the topic sometimes..she explained in details the work flow and processes going there. and we Had to listen although what we needed was far more simpler than that.Anyways we had to thank her..

At the end of the first hour and a half, she had said it all..
we thanked her and were abt to leave when she remembered that she had to give us some papers or whatever..so we had to wait 3ala mal papers tetsawar..el mohem
we had to staaay and with no complaining. Then she started the real talking:
she told us that ppl who travel abroad to study never come back.
that if they came back, a million things would get in the way of him/her trying to make use of the degree.She gave us an example by saying if a guy returned with a PhD. Dr.s here would envy him and would try with all means to push him away.
She told us that the ppl working in public sector are not only tired but they feel oppressed by the system.
She told us "barra el zabbal zay elwazeer..law 3amalteelo 7aga ye2ollek ana leeya 7o2oo2y..laken hena el nass betet7'arag men kollyet tebb w to3od 3ala el raseef w mesh la2aya sho3'l".
"barra el bany2aadam 3'aly ya benty..maynfa3sh yeggarbo 3ala bany2admeen keda zay fe tebb 3andena.."
"el balad feeha fasad..law gom ersheen fe ayy edara..law etlafety hatl2eehom et7'do lel nass el kebeera.."
"el balad aow7ash 7aga feeha el fasad el edary..mafeesh dameer..w kollo rashawy w araf..w bey7sal balawy fel balad deh ya benty w 3eeny 3enak"
"ya3ny enty masaln awel lamma tet7'argy haddawry 3ala eh..mesh 3ala wasta? aady awel fasad fel mogtama3..3omr 7add hay2ollek ta3aly esht3'aly 3ashan kaf2tek? naader awy naader.."
"el balad deh mesh haysle7aha 3'eer 7aga wa7da bass..saowra..fakra ya benty fel taree7' lamma kano bey2olona ahdaf el sawroa aamet 3ashan yesheelo el 7agat el we7sha..aady koll el 7agat deh mawgooda delwa2ty w aktar"
"e7na dawla mot7'alefa..w hanfadal tool 3morana mot7'alfeen law fedelna netaty keda"

she even gave us advise(!):
"lazem teggawey wa7ed zoo markaz..3ashan ye3raf eddafa3 feeky kam 3ala matet3almy w tekbary ..ew3y ta7'dy wa7ed a2al mennek..wes2aleeny ana.."



she concluded by apologizing if she gave us a "black" version of egypt.
nothing she said was new or unheard of..but the way she said it gave me the impression that she deals with corruption everyday. it made me wonder how bad things really are?
and are we reaching the point of "it can only get better".. or there is still worse to come?
how am i going to survive all that in the future? how do ppl cope with that? and how many decided "el nass kollaha bet3mel keda" and went with the flow?

anyways..back to madam fat7ya..her words were an eye-opener on things that i have seen earlier but never gave it a name "ya 3eeny 3aleeky ya balad"..

gjOe in Moggama3 el Ta7reer:Part I

A huge building no doubt..full of history, dust, files, beuracracy and People!! When ever you need to extarct a paper or a document somehow in the dreadful lousy process u'll end up in moggama3 el ta7ereer...My encounter with moggama3 el ta7reer was not as dramatic as i thought it would be..although i did hear, see and smell biZZare things!
okay..my picture of moggama3 el ta7reer was all from Adel Emam's all-famous el erhab wel kabab..i thought that i would be going up in a spiral until i get to the office i want..and i thought that i would find a sucisidal person in the elevator and i thought i would find rice being handpicked on desks..and i thought i would find people leaving thier work and praying when there was no prayers to be done..and i thought i would find an unnoticable "wa7ed beynnadaf gezam" by the stairs..
to my dissapointment.. i have found none of that..

Reality :

i went there by 11..i found ppl having thier breakfast..
i found women fighting over nothing..
i found ppl sleeping on desks..
i found careless tired egyptian faces all over the place..
i found ppl not doing what they are supposed to do: work
i found an undescribable blend of smells..

the general attitude of ppl there: am not paid enoff to care..

i didnt expect nothing other than that really..but it was a first time encounter with the building..

The most interesting part though is still to come : madam fat7ya !

Im Walking Away

Ill walk away...
ill walk away and not look back
with no regrets, with no memories.Nothing but my learned lesson.
it's the right thing to do..and it was the rite thing to be done from the very start..
Days will go by and ill be proven wrong..and then more days will go by and ill be proven right..
i should have listened..i should have watched..i should have knew..but it doesn't matter..no regrets..There is nothing here for me to stay for. There is nothing worth waiting for. I've made up my mind and I have decided to walk away.As Far and As Away and As Fast As Possible.

no coming back and that's final..Ill walk away gladly, gracefully and with no harm done..
Ill walk away quietly,walking with one thought on my mind..I know I 'll survive this one too :)

Zihuatanejo

I wanna go There.Zihuatanejo.The land with no memory.It's not that i want to live there..Its just an idea..a concept..a symbol of a paradise-ish getaway..some place where no one knows you and no one is expecting any behaviour, attitude, or ever assignments from you.Zihuatanejo is just the place for me..for anybody i think.You may wonder how did i know of such a place.well, ull have to watch "The shawshank redemption".And you'll understand the symbolic meaning i give to the place.
Am so trapped in the box of everyday life and everyday problems and everyday routine and everyday same-old-same-old.I wanna go there!
I love beaches in general. Watching the sea makes me feel the Greatness of its Creator.Closing my eyes and listening to its roaring waves crushing on the shore makes me feel the Mightiness of its Creator. Let alone the Wideness of the sea..and how it meets with the sky at some faraway line called the horizon..And the breeeze!!The breeze is so relaxing and so refreshing..i think it is such a mood lifter just to feel the chilling-warm breeze by you skin.So gentle.So Comforting.

Freaky Friday!

2day was fe3lan fe3lan..yoom 3'areeb, unexpected, unplanned for, hectic, long, exausting..

2day i almost cried and i laffed out loud in the same minute..

2day ppl surprised me..they really did..el nass fedlo a3deen le7ad essa3a 8!

okay ill start from the beginning..

ennaharda ro7t el kollya..mal2tesh labs w mal2tesh datashow w mal2tesh participants..dah 3'eer tab3an enny abl mnzel men el beet el prez sa2altny 3ala el phone te2olly feen el moderators..
el mohem ya3ny ..kollo kan me2ale2 men 7ewar mafeesh particpants dah..
w fe3lan kan workshop feeha abt 6 participants..6 out of 40..

time for..IMPROVISING!!

and we did improvise alright..olna ne3mel merge w ne3mel debate between the 4 workshops..pretty risky and pretty amazing at the same time..lamma el nass betegamma3 keda feh situation wa7ed betbaan awy different personalities..w betbaan awy different types of ppl..and tab3an sooo many attention grabbers..some one shoot them..shoot them all!

and God el masryeen love to talk..ya3ny el mafrood el break yeb2a 3ala 3..its started @ 4 30..
kollo 3ayez yetkallem ba2a w kemmet el inconsistenecy..wel Improvising wel unplanning..


wel coffee break ba2a..makltesh feeh 7aga 7'ales..:( gabo taffet bateh w noss torta maslan..

bass bardo 3ala ra2y modertor: "ennaharda..no comment"fe3lan its true..e7na ettsarafa w 7'alas..and i think we did as best as we can..bedaleel enn kann feeh nass a3ada lel a7'er..
bass bardo kan feeh nass keteer meshyet..bass bardo u can never satistfy koll el nss..
el mohem ya3ny it turned out okay fel a7'er el 7amdollelah..

aktar 7aga day2etny ba2a the guy ely a3ad mestany ya 3eeny for like 4 hrs 3ashan ye2ool el kelmteen elly 3ando..
i didnt even aplogize..i was too embaressed menno w men el mawkef..bass begad makansh yenfa3 a3mel ayy 7aga.. 7asal 7'eer :D

bass el moderators essara7a ya3ny need fel3an a million thanks ..we2fo wa2fet reggala..w kan feeh radd fe3l saree3 w nadafet dema3' and surprisingly ..almost no complaining!
and they controlled the participants smoothely and the participants looked up to them..el7amdolellah fe3lan..things could have been much more worse..

the good thing was el debate zat nafsaha..fe3lan ma3arfsh leeh 7aseet la2 el balad kwyesa ya3ny..
and i decided to stay..
ill stay here! Egypt..
ill stay here! Home..

Ill keep this friday here blogged for the record..

The Bless Of Forgetness

Thank God We Forget!
Thank God we forget the pain, the agony or whatever bad experiences we encounter in our lives..Those who dont forget stay still where they are..Those who dont forget live in an everlasting hell..(i know by nature that hell actually is everlasting) .

But forgetting needs time..needs patience and sometimes even needs some one to decide to forget..its pretty hard to tell ur self "me, ill stop thinking abt this right now..ill forget about it"..the next thing you know is you spend the rest of the day fixated on the same very thought u told urself to forget!
Its like those silly time waster mind games that tell you..try not to think abt penguins for 2 mins..and all you would find urself thinking abt are thoses cute little black and white cuddling creatures!


Thank God i forgot all about the things that used to bother me long time ago..
Such a relieving bless...a burden over my shoulders..i worry abt a whole new things now!

gtg now, forgot to feed my cat!

What kept me going

What kept me going was faith
faith in Allah

What kept me going was hope
hope that things would get better...

What kept me going was persistence
by which i ignore whatever limitations and taking things one step @ a time no matter how small they were

What kept me going was motivation
just proving to myself that i can do it was a one-hell of a motivation

What kept me going was support
whether it came from friends, family or those who have a very little impact on my life.

Ill keep going, Ill keep moving ahead and Ill only look back @ things that help me go forward in my life and the Hereafter.

Wilsooon..am sorry Wilson!!

I was watching a part of american idol the other day when it occured to me that the human being has the most unrational ability of overrating things..thier cars, mobile phones, books, habits..overrating a competition..overrating a success, a failure, a concept, a tradition,sports,celebrities.. overrating love,anger and revenge ..just name it..

At the end of phase one in american idol where they choose who to continue and who is excluded from the very start, they showed a documentary viewing all those who lost and won..people get either extreeeeemly happy or extreeeeeeemly frustrated..and by extremeeeeely i mean some where moved to the hospital when they heard that they lost..
okay, i understand that this is a competition and ppl tend to over react and all that..specially that its on national TV..but still its overrated..i mean who remembers all the winners of american idol? who cares?

but the thing is overrating things is a natural behaviour done by ppl everywhere..

if u ever watched "Castaway" by tom hanks ull know what i mean..i didnt like the movie that much, but what astonished me is the "bond" (which is even beyond a friendship) between tom hanks and "wilson ".. the volley ball..remember the scene where the ball falls in the ocean and tom hanks tries to save it by his "soul"..i think the only thing that ever stopped him was his own survival instinct..
As an outsider..u view wilson as merely a volleyball..so what if it's lost in the big blue ocean..but for him that wilson was more than that..he overrated the ball..he gave it false added-value where in fact its just a "volleyball"...he overrated a ball made of plastic to the extend he almost drowned to save it..pretty irrational u think.
actually we do the same..on things even less important than wilson..at least tom hanks had his excuse of living alone in a far away island..
The ball was overrated..it was given false added- value..that made the
if u dont believe it..watch those sports-zealots..ppl go WILD over scoring a goal..i never understand it..they think of it as VICTORY..it merely a game and its highly overrated..
the only ppl who have the rite to feel whatever triumph are the players themselves..they are the ones who worked their heads off trying to win a match or sth..why the hell a fat lazy person sitting on a couch at home watching the game, eating up his bag of chips ,feel related and even far more excited abt a goal than the players themselves..? very overrated

its the same all around..

Afghan Gurl

I loved That picture.I saw it before like 5 years ago or sth..and i rememembed it and started googling!This engine is like the best!

Its called "afghan gurl" and was taken when the gurl was 12 or sth..now she is married with 2 kids!

I just love her gaze..and the fact that nothing is fake abt her..she seems so innocent yet cautious about something..She's beautiful..She's perfect..

TO The Most Annoying Person I Ever Heard About

Least Dear H,

I ll start and end by saying :i Hate u.. altho i never saw u.

ana hakkelam men el alb..bema ennak ull never read this isA...
u had one of a kind gurl ..u had a gift..u had the closest thing from heaven u can get..and u be3'ba2ak..w be 7aga tanya feek malhaash lessa esm..u lost all that..lost eh? danta u made sure hold it soo close.. untill she is attached..and then snitch it and throw it as far as away from u..
la2 w eeeh.. danta kaman u knew all that..and u used her.. u manipulated her feelings..FEELINGS..(look it up in the dictionary, i wont waste my time explaining..kefaya am wasting my time bashtem) ezzay te3mel keda? ezzay...i hate ppl who hurt my friends..specially the one u've hurt..w sa3at ba2ool le nafsy "ha ha ha.. dah 7emar dah walla eh.. he doesnt know what he's missing"
ana maslan.. when i have a stupid crush.. i take a while to get over it.. i rationalize..bass my friend..she loved u..LOVED..(look it up bardo ya stupid..bass look for "LOVE" men 3'eer el D ya 7emar).. she LOVED u..and u pushed her that way..ya3ny enta kont 3aref w kont ased..and she told u balash..and she told herslef balash.. basss ezzay w ezzay ba2a..u were soo selfish(akeed selfish deh ba2a enta 3arfha)..
ana lamma my friend kanet bet3od tekkalem about u..kont ba2ool le nafsy...if i was in her shoes..ill never fall in that trap..bass actually..i would..3ashan ur soo slick..ur such a manipulator..ur world revolves around you..
keep in mind..that kama todeeno todan..and some day..hat7'od 7ettet afa..and doesnt matter wether this day is soon or not..bass when it comes..u should be smart enoff to know dah zamb meen...
my friend? am not worried abt her..she is so sincere and so precious and she'll fine the ONE she deserves,,ur not the ONE..ur a miarge..ur fake..ur wala 7aga..
and to my friend ill say: be pateint..ull find HIME..the ONE that completes u the ONE u cant live without..the ONE ull be happy with..but most of all..the ONE who feels the same about U..the ONE who cherishes U..the ONE that u complete..so best of Luck!!
and as i promised u: i HATE u..from all my heart


Dedicated to My friend :D

Thank God For..

Being a muslim

Being a gurl

Being an Egyptian

Having Brains

Speaking Out

Seeing Behind Things

Having My Family

IceCream!

Ma7shy

Hope

Dreaming

Blogging

Summer Time

Winter Time

Bed Time

Friends

Health

God
=========================================================
Thanks God for NOT:

Being Blonde

Being a Racist :P

Having double faced freinds

Being shorter

Being in an illegal relationship

Being Blind

Being a genius

Being Handicapped

Taking everything for granted(ok, i take some for granted)

Suffering from Amnesia

Suffering from Any Kind Of Chronic Pain

Dead

Being Ignorant

Living at any other time but now.
===================================================================
I Ask God For:

Moving to a Quiter Place

A Rank

A good job

Having Perferct Teeth

Being Athletic

An hour more each day

Peace of Mind

Being able to really HELP people

Happiness for my Family

Dreams Coming true for my Freinds

More Faith
===================================================================


Relieved :)

:(

ana 7assa eny ma7'noo2a..
tayha
w ma7desh fahmny
w mesh 3aya akkalem 7add..
w mesh 3ayza 7add yesm3ny

tab leh? leeh mab2aash mabsoota?w mafeesh 7aga tedaye2..?
leh mab2ash far7ana w mafeesh 7aga teza3al?!
is there happiness on earth?
or is it an evelasting pursue that has no end?

Help..

ppl what's up with u!?

malhom keda ma7desh taye2 el tany w a3deen le ba3d 3ala el wa7da?

y does the world, so big, seems to be overwhelmed by all the suffer,pain, agony, misery and troublesome caused by people to one another?

World, Take a deep breath ..*IN*..now slowy *Out*...much better :)

give ur self a rest and give others a break,and a shower wont harm too!

Ppl Who Breath

Dont u just hate ppl who breath..they get on ur nerves for absoltely no reason but existing...I think this is very natural and justfied..well, some ppl ur just attracted to unexplainably..u just like them and like to hang out with them..its called chemistry..its when that other person..no matter what they say..it always seems the absolute rite thing to say!

On the other hand, there are ppl who breath..and they dont hide it! They even make a sound while breathing! can u imagine !!The thing is they do more noise while drinking, eating, walking or even looking on sth..If u bumped into such aperson well..its chemistry alrite..but its hazaradous..

well , call me shallow..but am not judging ppl on how they look..rather on how they breath...

U mite never understand..:(

They are doing it again!!Stop Breathing!!

BrainStorming:Brain Damage

It has been proven..by a group of highly rank "mehayeeseen" that brain storming is NOT good for ur brain..forget creativity, forget that out of the box ideas..se7etak bel donya..

for the record i spent the most biZZare time of my life..doing wat? u guessed it..brain storming..oh i stormed all rite.. and only rained smelly slogans that u have to watch out for (Warning:dont try to understand the previous phrase, It mite cause irritations)..

u mite not believe me by now..well..its my reponsibility to tell u all..wat exactly does brainstorming do 2 u (Caution(Caution 3'eer Warning 7'aly balko): The following list might be disturbing..It is not advised to read if u are suffering from blood pressure,heart attacks,an unstable relationship,an empty stomach ,or idenitity issues.)

1-You will tend to think SLOWLY u mite spend a 1 min time trying to fetch word , put them together, in order to compliment a friend on some painting she has.

2- It is very unexplained what does brainstorming does to your stomach.. specially when ur forced to a meal.Researches ar still in dilemma..

3- To LIfe, From Life,For Life,Up Life, Under Life, Over Life, Get a Life,Run for Ur Life,Life goes on,Life is the conradiction of death, about Life,Beyond Life,
The above list is full of energy and life,the problem is they keep recoming to ur mind when ur brainstorming about life, i mean anything else in life(you see!!) It seems that the word is ALIVE!

4-For The Sake of Creativity, things get pretty messed up (in ur brain silly, where else)ull start to be confused, distorded, disfigured and u try hopelessly to systemize ur thinking along with ur existence..leeh maynfea3sh ell etenneen ye co-exist? i have noo idea

5-Things get very unhealthy and un hygenic..u get infections go with the flu, smell some slogans, and the conatmination seems to get every one.. including ur best friends,,its not a good thing to see..specially when ur on the 11th floor

6- ull spend alot of time trying to stop that storm ... but nooooo.. any word ull see, hear,or smell would enter that stormy brain of urs and *Thunderr* u try to make anyuse of it..and make any connections with other words and create stories in other lives and realems..
exmple(for the sake of illustration): hand,shake,vibrate,move, quake, run for life!! Life" is always there..Love ba2a is not.. :P

7- Brainstorming takes a while, because here u are in the midst of no where (gamb el nafoora kda) and trying hardly to syncronize ur exixtence,then fag2a some one calls and u try to motivate THIER existence,and unleaSH their botenSHals..not only that ,u should figure out a way to embower cababailities..while avoiding taking any STEPs towards anything in haste..and on ur laptop ur idenitity is upgrading and u jaust have to wait.. poor u..life sux

8- a major side effect of brainstorming is wearing sth that goes with ur hair color..that is natural ofcourse..actually its not a side effect..its a sypmtom that brainstorming gayy fel sekka..alf mabrook...

9-Thesaurus.com


10-w twinkle twinkle little staaaaaar

I need a Path

Dear Blog,(its really cliche to start like that)

i want a path..a definite clear end-to-end path...
a path has a direction, length, obstacle, and needs to give up other paths,that is if im at a crossroad.

sometimes all u have on the path is that light at the end that tells you are going on the rite direction...and thru most of the journey in that path..the light is just a small dot of brightness.. and thats all u need.

ok lets start path-making, or path-finding

ppl stop it !

Dear PPL,

You Ppl, including those i like the most, get on my nerves sometimes. Actually its not the ppl its the way they compare everything and everyone. i want a house like hers , i want a wife like his, i want a mobile like my cousin, i want something like someone's !!just keep ur mind on wat u have..PLz! i mean for the sake of everyone, including ur self..
ull start comparing ull end up envying everyone for what they've got and mite even turn into a thief or sth!
ppl should really focus on what blessings they have and remember that THINGS dont and will never make anyone happier..and the are a whole long list of ppl who have got-it-all and commited suicide..i think that should tell u sth..
i mean what would make u believe that for example being thinner would make u any happier? or have more friends or even a companion?
It has NOTHING to do with it.. i know alot of thin B***** who really have to go on some attitude-suction!

U should be HAPPY for who u are.. ur defects and imperfections..and by HAPPY i mean laffing all day long and being grateful to what Allah has given U and not given the others.. u probably wont notice these things coz u were so consumed by seeing what do ppl have that u dont instead of seeing what do u have that ppl dont!

Note to Ppl: Ppl's business is none of your business.

Private Thots getting Public

My sister asked me : for whom?
Me: for anyone ya3ny..
My sister :Aywa ya3ny .. leh bardo?
Me: Its like writing in a diary..that everybody reads:D
My sister : *face*..what's the point?
Me: e7m..well you know.. sharing ideas w keda ya3ny.. ah.. w momken 7add ye-comment 3ala elly enty katbahaa..
My sister :grammar mistakes ya3ny w keda :P
Me: yyoooo bossy everybody is doing it, my friends are doing it, and gogosh is doing it .. so im doing it! ( u can justify almost anything that way!)
My sister: ok.. ill start blogging too!
Me: mashy bas estany lamma a7'alas..

Faith..

In the constant search for self and trying to reach out for others,holding on to one's faith is wat keeps one going.

In dark silent times, when no direction visible, or no shore nearby, holding on to one's faith is wat keeps one going.

Feeling invisible, isolated, estbn, ignored or alone, holding on to one's faith is wat keeps one going.

Faith in Allah,
Faith in Angels,
Faith in Prophets and the messages delivered
Faith in Hereafter,
Faith in Destiny its good and bad..

Faith in self