Saturday, July 05, 2008

Grief in a Scarred Heart.

Right now my heart is aching. My deep feeling of pain and sorrow is beyond my capability of expressiveness. Life seems surreal and many things are suddenly out of proportion, while other stuff re-gained importance. Nothing has such an effect on our perspective of life like death.

There is no other way to put forth the bad news that some readers might already know except just saying it: My boss lost his 3 kids (ages ranging from 14 to 2) in a car accident last Thursday. They were heading for a weekend escape and Allah's will interfered with what they had planned. Miraculously, both my boss and his wife are in perfect shape. But of course not quite so. I can not comprehend or imagine what they must be feeling right now. Although I have been subconsciously trying to.

So the last three nights I was sleepless. I am never sleepless unless an earthquake hits. I kept on tossing and turning while my mind is slowly taking in the news. My mind was also searching for an explanation for what happened. Praying God to show those parents mercy and the wisdom behind His act.

Going to the funeral yesterday, was also a hard yet enlightening thing. I walked in a room full of tears, and saddness like it is in the air. But I have told myself that I will probably know the mother by being the one crying the most. And I was very wrong. I found her holding on more than I could ever imagine. Even capable of answering back what people have to say and thank them for coming. She like an angel. I found her not even "motamaska" but more of "mo2mena" be qadaa2 Allah. I heard my mom whispering in my ears "deh omm Rabbena estafaha begad. Deh akeed feeha 7aga mo7'talefa".

Although I already know a lot of people already praying for them,I ask readers to include those parents and their childern in your prayer. They need each and every one.


Deeeeeee said...

Ayy!! Gjo, that post physically hurts! I don't want to even imagine putting myself in his shoes.. ayy ayy ayy! Rabena yessabarhom both!

insomniac said...

i had goose pumps and i still can't seem to shake them off!! Rabena yer7amhom we yessabar ahaleehom we ye7fazna gamee3an!!

la elaha ella Allah

jessyz said...

El Baka2 lellah wa7doh, Rabena yesabarhom we ye5lef 3alhom 5eir

gjoe said...

Dee: yes, please. Don't do that. Haven't worked gracefully for me!

Inso: Keep the prayers going.

Jessyz: Aamen ya Jessyz

sama said...

you know what...they're truly blessed ,these kids are gonna take their hands and guide them to Heaven in the after life...i pray Allah grants them patience ya rab...rabena y3awadhom 7'air.

gjoe said...

Sama: Thanks Sama for your insight. Actually when I think of it that way, I find myself saying "ya ba7'tohom".
God Bless your wisdom.