"Just Keep Swimming"

The End

2008-09-09T10:56:00.000-07:00

I am closing it down.

Assalamo 3alykom.

You can follow me here on my now-relatively-old blog !

One of My Favorite Hadeeths

2008-09-08T15:35:00.000-07:00

قال عليه الصلاة والسلام :

المؤمن القوى خير وأحب إلى الله من المؤمن الضعيف وفي كل خير ..
احرص على ما ينفعك واستعن بالله ولا تعجز ..
فإن أصابك شيء فلا تقل : لو أني فعلت كذا وكذا ولكن قل قدر الله وما شاء فعل
فإن لو تفتح عمل الشيطان

Handy Woman

2008-09-06T13:54:00.000-07:00

I just fixed the cable of our receiver by remembering how my dad fixed it like 7 years ago (yes, it is an old receiver )

Ana mabsoota awy :D

The first thing it played was the infamous commercial:

Ebny beetak yabn balady kollena nefdal warak
Ra7tak enta hamm 3andy wenta awla nekoon ma3ak

Beeeeeetak hans3adak tebneeh
Kollena wa2feen gambak feeeh

من أقوال علي بن أبي طالب

2008-09-05T17:17:00.000-07:00

من أصلح ما بينه وبين الله أصلح الله ما بينه وبين الناس ، ومن أصلح أمر آخرته أصلح الله له أمر دنياه ، ومن كان له من نفسه واعظا كان عليه من الله حافظ

إذا نزل بك مكروه فانظر فان كان لك حيلة فلا تعجز وان لم يكن فيه حيلة فلا تجزع

إن تتعب في البر فان التعب يزول والبر يبقى

من عظم صغار المصائب ابتلاه الله بكبارها

كل نعيم دون الجنة فهو محقور وكل بلاء دون النار عافية

العفاف زينة الفقر والشكر زينة الغنى

أسوأ الناس حالا من لا يثق بأحد لسوء ظنه ولا يثق به أحد لسوء أثره

إن النعمـة موصولـة بالشكــر
والشكــر متعلـق بالمزيـد
ولن ينقطـع المزيـد من الله حتى ينقطـع الشكـر من العبـد

Tiger Woods investing in Dubai

2008-09-02T14:48:00.001-07:00

It is called Tiger Woods Dubai (Duuuh!) and it's Huge Project!

Today..

2008-09-02T00:53:00.000-07:00

Today is Cherry's Birthday. She is turning 21 :D

Yuppieeeee!

And you know what? Everybody I know (and I mean it), is a virgo! September is like the birthday month for me.

My Favorite Color

2008-08-26T06:41:00.000-07:00

Commoners call it Batee7'y. Formally it is Coral, But more specifically it is known as #FF7F5 (Hexadecimal-y speaking).

It really lightens up my day !

Purposeless Post

2008-08-25T15:28:00.000-07:00

I have many unpublished posts. Mostly rant, post-fight emotions, ranging from simple quarrels that are actually funny, to waves of rage. Mostly they talk about the same thing, how confused I am, how uncertain I have become, how angry, apathetic and in total despair.

I am starting to get into a "I don't like this blog anymore" phase. I think a lot of closing it, or abandoning it, or just leave it to rot in the blogosphere.. Other times, when I write a new post and feel that I recorded something down, something that might be of a tiny winy use, I feel glad that I still have it.

But to be honest, I don't speak my head off when I write in this blog anymore. I never did actually, but now it is even more. Always the:I should say this, I must not say that. No rant about work no rant about family no rant about friends, no rant at all!! All my rants are unpublished. It is not that I mind, I mean the process of writing down what I feel and channeling out whatever useless and unrelated series of thoughts is good enough for me.

Tesba7o 3ala 7'eer.

Decision

2008-08-22T15:47:00.000-07:00

I decided that this Ramadan insha'Allah I will try to read the Qura'an differently. Year after year, and time after time, I read many verses that i could not understand, or misunderstood. I decided that I will read it slower this time but just to read it better. I will probably try reading out of ketab tafseer. I mean if I could get deeper meanings out of novels I read and movies I watch, I better get deeper meanings from the verses of the Quraan.

The main thing that I want to understand is: coherency. I don't know if others have these questions or not, but I usually wonder why a certain Suraah is named a certain name, or why are these two seemingly different topics mentioned beside each other in the same Suraah? Why is the most mentioned prophet Story is Sayedna Musa with Bany-Israel? I have many other questions that have to do with the Arabic structure of the Ayahs and whether there is a significance of the ordering of the Surahs, the circumstances behind some Ayahs and Suraahs that would definitly clarify a lot of things about the Quraan. I am sad that I know so much about other things (that might be even useless) than I know about what Allah has to say to humanity.

AfterMath

2008-08-20T03:38:00.000-07:00

Cherry: oojy, howa delwa2ty ba3d lamma Maglesh el Shoora et7ara2, el nass lamma yeego yastasheeroh ba3d, "Hayglesoh" feen?
Me: 3'aleban fel beta3 elly gambeeh, fe Maglesh el Sha3b.
Cherry: Tab keda mesh hayb2a za7ma? w ba3deen akeed homma mesh yeglesoh ma3 el sha3b.
Me: Ma homma hayzzana2oh ba2a w yesta7meloh ba3d shwaya.. They will take turns.
Cherry: hmmm.. bardo mesh moqtane3a
Me:ao moken yestasheeroh ba3d 3al wa2ef
Cherry: fekra bardo, yeb2a keda hay7'doh qararat besor3a..
Me: ao metkarewta
Cherry: Rabbena yostor.

3ala sa3eeden a7'ar..

M@hdeto (to his brother): Haat yabny el gezeera maglesh el shoora is on fire
Brother(flipping to al gezeera el ryadaya): ahoh, el match sha3'aal.
M@hdetoh: Yabny haat egezeera, maglesh el shoora!!
Brother: Yaksh yewla3!..estana, dah walla3 fe3lan!

Realization

2008-08-18T15:56:00.001-07:00

I am not the center of the universe.

3'areeba.

Zoroony

2008-08-18T15:29:00.000-07:00

RULES:
1. Put your iTunes/music player on Shuffle,
2. For each question, press the next button to get you answer,
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT!!

NOTE: Alabt my laptop for all the scattered songs that i have. They are 6 songs bel tamam wel kamal. Wa7da menhom is not even a song. El mohem ya3ny, i had fun commenting, eshme3na ana ya3ny.

1. IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?
EL leqa2 el thany-- 3omar 7'ayrat
( asdo ya3ny forsa tanya isA)

2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
saba7 w masa--Fairouz
( meaning i am always online?)

3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Ahoh dah elly saar--Fairouz

4. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Zoroony--Fairouz
(i feel alone, bass mesh lonely.)

5. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
These are a few of my favorite things

6. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Ma 3andy Alb-- Ayman el A3tar
(LOOOL.. I think I know people who would agree to that.)

7. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Saba7 w Masa--Fairouz

(aywa sa7, homma sob7 w leel yeza3a2ooly)

8. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Zoroony--Fairouz
(i listen to the song too much)

9. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
El leqa2 el thany-- 3omar 7'ayrat
(yeah, i agree..the first impression was not a blast.)

10.WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Ma 3andy alb-- Ayman el A3tar
(Ma7na olna ba2a ma 3andy alb a 'like' be a person in the first place)

11.WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
aho dah elly sar--Fairouz

(elly 7asal 7asal ba2a)

12.WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Zoroony--Fairouz
(I don't see the person I like, maybzorneesh keteer, maybe because they are non-existent)

13.WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
These are a few of my favorite things
:)

14. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Saba7 w masa--Fairouz
(i hope not!)

15. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
El leqa2 el thany-- 3omar 7'ayrat
(I don't believe in reincarnation.)

16.WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Aho dah elly sar--Fairouz

17. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Ma 3andy Alb
(I think this is not a secret anymore)

18.WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Saba7 w masa--Fairouz
(To Dee: reminds me of nazaryet el tashabo3)

19. WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
Zoroony--Fairouz
( aywa keda)

20. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOURSELF?
EL leqa2 el thany-- 3omar 7'ayrat
(i think that should have been "Ma 3andy Alb", stupid shuffle)

No one to be tagged, I am like the last one on the blogosphere to do the tag..

koll tag wento bel se77a wel saalama

A suggested list for the fellow Egyptians

2008-08-16T19:43:00.000-07:00

I think Egyptians should start doing the following:

1- Acknowledging bikes as reliable means for transportation. Also carpooling would not be bad.

2- Listening to the weather news, specially at turbulent times like fall, winter and spring :)

3- Reading other stuff than the newspaper.

4- Reading other sections in the newspaper other than sports.

5- Taking daily shower, specially if using public transportation

6- Giving a damn.

7- Gardening.

I think also they should stop doing the following now we are at it:

1- Littering

2- Smoking

3- Watching Noor

4- Complaining

A Reference for Status Messages on Facebook

2008-08-15T11:21:00.000-07:00

Borrowed from 7akifadi

I am: content yet angry at myself.
I think: too much sometimes.
I know: I can do better than that.
I have: to stop worrying.
I wish: I could go live in the suburbs, go to work on a bike, live in a friendly neighborhood..keda ya3ny :). I also wish I lived in some other (earlier) time.
I hate: my conscious apathy, my laziness and my time management habits.
I miss: Babaya and Grandpa.
I fear: both the future and death.
I hear: A distant shee7' from Eza3et el Quraan El Kareem
I smell: the smell of mango :)
I crave: for Carvel Ice-cream (mennek lelalh ya Dee)
I search: using Google of course!
I wonder: if I will ever change, to better or to worse. I have been feeling that I am ma7allak serr for a long time now.
I regret: some minor stuff.
I love: my family, and the fact that I am a Muslim. El7amdolellah!
I ache: from my brain cells.
I am not: stupid.
I believe: I can flyyyy!!
I sing: terribly.
I cry: on daily basis.
I fight: a losing battle.
I win: people easily.
I lose: my stuff too often.
I never: search for love.
I always: pray for good stuff to happen.
I confuse: reality with cartoons sometimes.
I listen: to Sayed a lot. But ignore his advices too soon.
I can usually be found: Online.
I am scared: of losing someone I love.
I need: Babaya.
I am happy about: moving out!
I imagine: heaven.

I enjoyed writing this post. It is not a tag, but I encourage you to write one.(An implicit tag.)

Too late

2008-08-14T15:36:00.000-07:00

I opened firefox in frustration in order to rant in the blog about some stuff that are bothering me. By the time I opened the New Post page, I cooled off and I am actually content. Are my mood swings too fast? Is Firefox too slow to keep up?

P.S: I am enjoying that everybody is fel sa7el. Seriously, the country is amazingly quiet, the traffic is perfect, and I am having good practice on my driving el7amdolellah. Actually el balad fadya le daraget enny 7assa enn mesh heya deh Cairo elly ana 3arfaha, and I sometimes feel as if I AM fe masyaf.

Mutual Friend: Deee

2008-08-12T12:57:00.000-07:00

I'll have a conversation similar to the one below with anyone I know through Dee:

New Friend: Enty ba2a gjoe :) i never knew your real name
Me: gihan.. :)
New Friend: tashafrana ya sett gihan..
New Friend: bass 3'areeb awy gjoe dah, gihan is a gigi
Me: aywa, bass ana bakrah gigi dah, w kaman i have too many nicknames instead..my family members call me oojy..
New Friend: hehe/lol/haha :D
Me: Dee is the one who came up with the "g-joe" spelling, zaman kan geegoo
New Friend: Dee deh gameela awy/gamda awy/shtra geddan/me3adaya
Me: Yeah! I know :)
New Friend: 3ala fekra heya bet7ebbek awy.. dayman toshkorly feeky, she thinks very highly of you and she thinks that you are hilarious!
Me: :$ I love her too, She is such an amazing friend, w law ana hilarious ommal heya eh!!

A couple of chatting later..

New Friend: enty sa7ee7 3ala el facebook?
Me: Yeah.. Hatla2eeny 3and Dee..
New Friend (After adding me and seeing a couple of pics): yeaaah! enty w dina ezzay shakloh zay ba3d, mesh shaklan..bass 7assah enek you look like a friend-of-Dee kinda person.
Me: yeah, we had this friends beybhatoh 3ala ba3d convo before :)

People who

2008-08-12T09:51:00.000-07:00

There is a couple of stuff that total strangers do that totally get on my nerves for sometimes no justifiable reason. Here is a few:

1- People who are lazy to walk up/down the escalators. I don't know why people like to stand in the escalators instead of moving. I mean it is made to make things faster, not people lazier. w ba3deen if you are too lazy to move, please take a side so that others can pass.

2- Close-talkers:Buzz off will ya?.. begad i NEED my personal space.

3- Za7ma-creators: This includes roughly 80% + of Egyptians. But in general it includes taxi drivers who slow down in "the middle of the road" to pick up people,; People who go 3aks el etgah be dahrhom 3ashan they missed an exit, and even the annoying fact that we simply and genetically can not form a decent line to wait for our turn.

4- People who drag their feet while walking and make a "shhhhht-shhhht" sound with their sandals/shebsheb/shoes.

5-Pedestrians that walk in a narrow street with total disregard of the cars. They can actually see/hear a car coming from behind or infront of them and don't care to stop or move aside la7ad lamma el 3arabya te3addy.Tana7a keda w la mobalaah.

6- W aktar 7aga betnarfezny (w tewadeeny keda w tegbny) people who play songs on thier mobiles w homma mashyeen. Most of the time these are teenage girls w beyb2a ma3ahom mobile nokia w 3'aleban beysh3'alloh tamer 7osny or shereen. No one asked you to entertain the streets thank you very much. Kindly try headphones, and definitely you DON'T ever ever sing a long fel sahre3.

I am starting to believe that I am living in the wrong country.

An Oh Yeah Post!

2008-08-10T12:15:00.000-07:00

I never saw that comming, bass Thanks To Inso, I am now fixated on Fairouz/Sayed Darwish

All day long, it is either Zoroony or Aho dah elly saar!!

Many thanks to you insomniac!!

Listening to (Duh!): زوروني كل سنة مرة

أخيرا

2008-08-09T04:53:00.000-07:00

أخيراً كل مشاكلنا اختفت!

أخيراً كل الأسعار إتثبتت

و كل المدارس والجامعات إتزبطت

و كل السجون إتشمعت

و كل البلاد إتحررت

و كل الاحلام إلي كان نفسي فيها إتحققت

أي حد ياكل, يجوز أو يشتغل..

خلاص كل الأمور إتيسرت!

رجعتلنا الكرامة والقوة والمكانة
صحي الضمير ملنوم
و رجعت والأمانة

مفضلناش غير مشكلة
إن فلان ساب علانة

gjoe.

Sick n' Tired

2008-08-07T15:16:00.000-07:00

I don't need to apologize.

7aga te2ref.

Tonight you are all going to be part of a social experiment.

2008-08-06T14:21:00.001-07:00

The "social experiment" that Joker played in the Dark Knight movie reminded me of some game I played about 4 months ago.

My favorite proffesor finished giving his pre-masters lecture material earlier than usual. Then he started by sayin:"Now I have some bonus marks to give any of you. The only condition for taking the bonus is that you agree that others take bonus as well. Otherwise, you will not get it." Sure enough the whole class roared "We all want the bonus. Give it to us". He smiled wickedly. He continued "Now here is the thing. I will divide you into 2 groups. Group A and Group B.Everyone from Group A will take a paper out, write a number from 1 to 10 along with his/her name. This number is the amount of bonus that you want.Now after that I will collect all the papers from group A, then randomly i'll give it to people from group B.Each one from group B will open the paper and see the number. The amount of bonus that he or she gets is the remaining quantity from subtracting 10 from the bonus jotted on the paper. This means that if someone from group A wrote 6, then the member from Group B who will get this paper would get a 4 marks bonus. That is of course if he agreed.But, If he thought that it was not fair and did not agree, then neither him nor the person from group A whose name is written on the paper will get any bonus. " People started laughing. I told him"Then every one will write down a 5. It is fair to both sides." He told me "Oh, you really think so? Someone who would get a paper with an 8 might think a 2 bonus marks is better than nothing.". Someone asked "Are these bonus marks for real?". The doctor answered "Why wouldn't they be?". Silence prevailed the class. People were looking suspiciously to one another as the doctor was dividing us into groups.

I was on group A. I got greedy to tell you the truth. And I knew for a fact that almost anyone from Group B would peacfully agree with whatever they get. They will not compare my bonus to thiers. They would compare thier bonus to a zero bonus. So I wrote an 8.5 on the paper, folded it and gave it to the doctor. Then he distributed the papers among people from Group B. He started collecting the numbers written on the papers and writing them on board. Most of the people wrote a 5, or a 6. There was one 9, two 8.5s, four 8s three 7s and one 2!!

He started getting answers from people of whether or not they would agree to the bonus they and the other person from Group A would get. There were a few jokes and laughs, but there were only 2 people who did not agree to what they would get.The one who got the paper with the 9 and another with an 8.

The doctor started asking questions. He told me for example why did you write an 8.5? Why werent you fair to the other guy as you suggested? I told him, I was willing to take the risk of the other guy agreeing with what they got. After all, a 1.5 is better than a zero. He asked the people from group B who agreed on the 3s and the 2s they got how did they make thier choice when it was seemingly not just to them. They jokingly answered "Howa e7na hantbbatar 3ala el bonus kaman.7add la2y!". He asked those who didn't agree and they normally answered "3allaya w 3ala a3da2y.It was not his right to make the decision in the first place, and I don't care about the bonus as much as i care about being fair."

The doctor then began by saying "I don't understand how people give themselves the right of taking more than they should, and other people who have the right to punish them, let them get away with it!" Ouch. That didn't feel good at all. I kinda knew where he was going from there. And I knew right away that I made an awfully wrong choice and what's worse was the justification I gave for myself and what's even worse was that I was predicted right. I got away with it.I got away with being greedy and not being fair.

He then explained "This is a social exercise by which they test and measure certain cultural paradigms. Instead of bonus marks it is played with money.The more rejections for the un-fair distribution of money, implies a more democratic a society ,and implies that people in that country exercise more freedom and own the right to punish and prosecute the greedy. They have the choice the right of disagreeing. Even if that came with a cost. Even if that meant a loss for them too. This is because preserving justice system more important than who will get what now. Naturally, countries like ours,Rejections tend to be low. Only 2 out of 10 rejected unfairness of what they would get. Also having 10 out of about 30 thinking they can get what they want depending on the others consent indicates major problems in our societies. I think that those who agree with the unfairness happening to them are more guilty that those who practice it. Or at least they are both equally guilty."

Needless to say, People started debating but mostly people were shocked at the implications of the game and everyone was reflective on thier decisions.

It was definitely enlightening.

If you want to know

2008-08-02T02:14:00.000-07:00

إذا أردت أن تعرف قدرك عند الله، فانظر فيما يستخدمك وبأيِّ الأعمال يشغلك

The Bike

2008-07-30T15:07:00.001-07:00

I remember the first time I was able to ride a bike (men 3'eer sannadat). It was in nady el Seed and I was 10 years old. My cousin was like 6. He spent a whole summer teasing me that although he was younger, he could ride the bike and I couldn't because I am a girl. I remember quite well that I had many trials, bumps and many falls. But I had enough of the teasing essara7a. He was generous enough to help me learn (imagine!). The trick my cousin claimed was in the speed. "law mesheety bel 3agala besor3a awy, mesh hatl7a2y to2a3y". So he lend me his bike and watched me fall off one time after the other after the other after the other. It was a pretty long exhausting day, my cousin had a lot of laughs and he insisted to show off a couple of times just to show me how to ride the bike.

Until it was the end of the day, like about 12 beleel. I remember because all the grown ups were tired and they wanted to go home. "7'amas da2aye2 bass ya baba.", I said. And I was granted my wish. They weren't really watching, they saw me fall off many times already. They just waited by the side of the walking track the five extra minutes. So I did the same thing I have been doing ba2aly 6 hours: Sitting on the bike, running with my legs so that the bike could gain some speed and then I would peddle from there when it was fast enough not fall. That was my plan. Suddenly it worked. I peddled and peddled, I was going pretty fast. I remember hearing my cousin from behind running"yalla besor3a..yalla kaman". I was ecstatic. A sense of achievement and happiness that was not disrupted by fear or pain. Finally it paid off. Finally I could sense the evening refreshing breeze on my face. I wasn't laughing, but I was smiling while concentrating on the road but mostly concentrating on recording the memory. All I have to do is keep peddling. Until I was hit by the sudden of thought of not knowing how to stop. How am I going to stop the bike? If I stopped peddling I will definitly lose the accelration but eventually I will fall off. Fair enough. So I lifted my feet from the peddle, closed my eyes and decided not to fall off gracefuly. As if to add drama for the day.

The moment I fell off the bike, I started laughing hysterically. My cousin came up and said "mawa2fteesh leh el 3agala berra7a?". I replied that I did that intentionally. "Shofteny kont bagry bel 3agala besor3a ezzay??". Cousin smiled while checking his bike and said "ah shoftek, ana kont waraky 3ala tool." I was proud of myself. Our parents are like so far away now. I can see them watching. But I could not see if they were smiling. I looked at the distance of the road back and bragged again"yaaah..dana mesheet bel 3agala keteer awy"And now I have to walk the distance back because I wasn't sure if I was able to ride the bike again, and my cousin already dediced that it would be his way of transportation back. But walking wasn't fast enough. I ran. I ran after him. With a proud smile on my face.

P.S: After that incident I spent sometime learning how to go left and right with the bike. It was about 3 weeks and I was able to go a whole circle around myself without falling off.

The 5 Things

2008-07-30T05:01:00.000-07:00

The 5 things I want to change about myself:

1- My complaining rate
2- My continuous fear from the future
3- My laziness
4- My inconsistent/self-contradicting attitude
5- My time wasting habits

The 5 things people tell me to change:
1- My aggressiveness
2- My short-termed memory loss.
3- My attention span
4- My selfishness
5- My inconsistent/self-contradicting attitude

The 5 things I want to keep:

1- My determination
2- My sense of humor.
3- My healthy diet habits
4- My big dreams
5- My faith/religious beliefs

The 5 things people say I must keep:

1- My determination
2- My creativity
3- My smile.
4- My ability to support/help someone to regain hope in themselves
5- N/A

واحة الحيرانين

2008-07-28T14:37:00.000-07:00

I have been humming the lyrics for quite some time now. When I was a small kid, I never understood a word of it. Now it feels like discovering something new that also triggers nostalgia!

منين بيجي الشجن
من اختلاف الزمن
ومنين بيجي الهوى
من اختلاف الهوى
ومنين بيجي السواد
من الطمع والعناد
ومنين بيجي الرضا
من الايمان بالقضا

من انكسار الروح في دوح الوطن
يجي احتضار الشوق في سجن البدن
من اختمار الحلم يجي النهار
يعود غريب الدار لـ أهل وسكن

ليه يا زمان ما سبتناش أبرياء
وواخدنا ليه في طريق ما منوش رجوع
أقسى همومنا يفجر السخرية
وأصفى ضحكة تتوه في بحر الدموع

منين بيجي الشجن من
اختلاف الزمن
ومنين بيجي الهوى من
اختلاف الهوى
ومنين بيجي السواد من
الطمع والعناد
ومنين بيجي الرضا من
الايمان بالقضا

ولفين ياخدنا الأنين
لليالي ما الهاش عينين
ولفين ياخدنا الحنين
لواحةالحيرانين

ما تسرسبيش يا سنيننا من بين ايدينا
ولا تنتهيش ده احنا يا دوبابتدينا
واللى له أول بكرة حيبان له آخر
وبكرة تفرج مهما ضاقت علينا

ولفين ياخدنا الأنين
لليالي ما الهاش عينين
ولفين ياخدناالحنين
لواحة الحيرانين

Mood: Cynical

2008-07-28T07:41:00.001-07:00

أنا مش بفهم ليه ساعات حد يبدأ التدوينة ب "وحشتووني جداجدا و اسف على التأخير و يا رب متكونوش قلقتوا عليا عشان أنا معلش كنت مشغول/ مسافر / بلعب كورة لوش الفجر/ متخانق مع جيراني على توصيلة النت". أولا لا أحد يكترث(نو بودي كيرز) عن انشغلاتك الا اذا كنت فعلا لعيب كورة في الاهلي أو الزمالك. ثانيا احنا وحشناك ازاي و انت متعرفش حد فينا يا بلوجر يا مفتري/مفترية ولا هو كلام ناس حافظة و مش فاهمة ثالثا بقى اكيد عمر ما حد حيقلق عليك عشان اصلا كل واحد فيه اللي مكفيه و اكيد محدش فاتح النت و قاعد مستني قدام البروسر ان حضرتك تتعطف علينا ببوست صغير تطمنا فيه عليك و عن أحوالك

اللي يقعد على النت ياما يشوف

Roots and Homes

2008-07-26T14:25:00.000-07:00

Inspired by Roba's Post with the Same Title
Where My father was Born:

Egypt,Giza

Where My mother was Born:

Sudan, Khartoum

Where They met:

KSA, Madina

Where I was born:

Egypt, Giza

Where I lived my first years of Childhood:

KSA, Jeddah

Where I lived my teen life:

KSA, Riyadh

Where I went to college:

Egypt, Cairo University

Which other countries I've been to:

UAE, Dubai

Bahrain

Where I want to spend the rest of my life:

NO IDEA!!

Ignore it.

2008-07-23T06:18:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, the only way to deal with pain or fear is to ignore it.Not accept it, not embrace it, not try understand it, but completely ignore it as if it is not there.

Quick Movie Review

2008-07-19T14:23:00.000-07:00

I never thought that the day would come in which I would tear up in an Ahmed Helmy movie. I loved it! If you ever go, don't judge the movie till its end. Even at the break you would feel that the movie hasn't started yet. At first,You get a few laughs, the usual ahmed-helmy feel, but you really wish from your heart that they start the damn movie. I remember whispering to my sister "Ana mesh 3arfa howa esm el film aasef 3ala el ez3ag leh, dah mafeesh ez3ag 7'ales fel film le daraget ennoh lessa mabada2sh!".

Bass it all starts when you go get your coke refill in the break and sit down for the second half..An an an aaaan!

Waiting for The Dark Knight :)

Speaking of traffic

2008-07-16T16:04:00.000-07:00

Starting Friday 1/8/2008, Egyptian traffic nightmares will be history!Apparently, Egyptian geniuses had this one thought out really well. The best way to overcome bad traffic is to perform a make-over to the old one..and here you go! Stricter rules, higher penalties, and overrated punishments seemed to be the best things they came up with. For example, no parking second line is allowed and those who do so, will be extremely punished. Well, It is rather annoying that people park their cars and pack up streets like that, but I seriously don't think they have any choice. Another example is having first aid boxes that must be available in cars all time. Yes that's right, that will solve the problem. I don't underestimate the importance of first-aid in emergency cases, but what I am saying is that we are not in a culture that was raised to know the basic rules of first aid. I know I don't. Maybe I should, but still that won't solve the problem.
Then once again el7ezam! That is given the assumption that cars move any faster than 30 Km/hr.

On a deeper level, giving helpless traffic regulators officers the power to threaten the people with tickets that are worth thousands of egyptian pounds, is a very disturbing thought. I believe it encourages bribery and blackmail. We all know exactly how the new law is going to be practiced. We will rather hear a lot more "koll sana wenta tayeb ya beeh".

And one more thing!

2008-07-16T15:38:00.000-07:00

I forgot to mention that Dee knows Spinneys by heart (walla was it like her first name?). El mohem she strolls around the aisles like it is home and she actually knows where each and every section is. She knows which fridges work best and have the coldest water, and which are safe to keep in her Fairoz sodas so that she could come back later to get them when they are cold. Dee actually referred to Spinneys as "El Dar Amaan". She might not know all the staff though. But I think she deliberately does not want to either! Whenever you are in Spinneys, there is a 72% chance that you would bump into Dee.. (At least I did).

I remember that day I bumped into her fe Spinneys! We had a job fair held by faculties of computers and information from all Egypt, many graduates came from all over to drop in their CVs and have stand-up interviews. It was held in the intercontinental City Stars. We were all excited about it w beta3. I then went with a friend to check for laptops (3ashan 7'alas ba2a keberna w bet3ona enharo men el misuse), when I bumped into Dee in her Jeans w kanet lessa me7'allasa "The Simpsons" w ra7et tegeeb Fairoz bardo. Ironically, Dee was the first to get a job (that she hated later) in our dof3a!

Ayyam!

On the first day of Christmas,

2008-07-14T23:39:00.000-07:00

Warning: This is a blog post that might make you think: huh?!

These are some stuff I learned a couple of days ago:
- Good Traffic is not always a good thing.
- Sometimes you need to live "around the edge".
- I need air-headed friends. 7aga keda style "Clueless" or I-wish-I-had-brains kinda people.
- How it feels to sing "12 Days of Christmas" at the top of your longs, while the heat of July is slapping your face because your friend is enjoying 6th October bridge el fady.
- Wondering what it would feel if we make faces at people at the other side of the 6th October Bridge just to make them feel worse that they are stuck at traffic and we are not.
- There is a one letter difference between Died and Diet.
- One good thing about you being dead, you don't need to do a diet, the weight will drop off any way.
- There is a subtle relationship between Micheal Jackson and a famous Egyptian Celebrity.
- The best selling song of all times according to Nile FM is: "A little less conversation". It is about 12 tam long. (tam= Turns Around elMedan)
- Jean-Pierre hates 7'aled Mattar. There are also many hate groups on facebook.
-7'aled mattar has a very unique fake British accent. You cAnt miss.
- If I ever applied to American Idol, I would probably be one of those who would crack you up laughing while wondering why do some people love to make a joke out of themselves on international TV. I will lose all the way.No matter what I sing, even if it is as slow as "I cant get no- sat -is -fact -ion". And I will lose, no matter what I wear, whether it is a cowboy-ish outfit or like a ballerina. and I will lose when I try to match the two styles together.
- There is exactly 45 steps between Spinneys and Compume. Going back and forth between them both is not very interesting, unlesss you like to annoy people who work there.
Me(asking a CompuMe staff): Law sama7ty, 3andoko gift certificates?
Lady:No.
Me: Then why are you following us?
- I have too many purposes for living. They all fit perfectly. And it is starting to get on my nerves. Complaining is not one of them though.
- Sometimes getting a gift for a newly wed friend who is very flexible and would be glad if you got her something as cheerful as cookies AND having 2 very practical,cut-the-crap shoppers to help you out is not as easy as it sounds.

Yet Another Post About Me.

2008-07-11T12:25:00.000-07:00

It was about 2 weeks ago. We were sitting in college, me and her, waiting for the pre-masters project evaluation to be decided. She is colleague. She was a close witness of my pre-masters drama and she suddenly started the following dialog:

Her: 3ala fekra enty a3'rab sha7'sya shofataha fe 7ayaty, w 7assa enny akeed mesh ha2abel wa7da zayek .
Me(was reading the kite runner, lift my head up in surprise):Na3am?
Her: Aywa, enty ensana 3'areeba geddan..ana 3omry mashoft keda..
Me(Smiling): What makes you say that?
Her: feeky 7agat keteer mesh rakba 3ala ba3d..ya3ny ana 3omry ma shoft wa7da friendly geddan w aggressive fe nafs el wa2t..Enty ezzay kda? Ezzay betb2y mabsoota awy marra wa7da w fag2a te2leby?
Her: hehe. Mesh 3arfa..bass 3ady ya..
Her: La2 mesh 3ady..enty sa3at bet3assbeeny geddan, w sa3at mesh betfre2 ma3aky enty bet2ooly el kalam dah lemeen..enty 3arfa el nass betsta7melek leh?
Me: leh?
Her: 3ashan bet7ebbek..aywa, enty law 7'serty 7add 3ashan el taree2a beta3etek lamma betet3assaby, hatbatly te3mely keda..bass 3ashan enty lamma betb2y mabsoota betb2y kwayesa awy, fal nass betesta7melek..
Me: Don't forget that it costs me alot of apologies. Mama dayman te2olly enty hate3tezry keteer fe 7ayatek..
Her: la2 w eh..lamma teb2y farfoosha w beta3..ya salaaaam..bet7'ally el wa7ed tayer men el far7a..ya3ny moodek beybhat 3ala elly 7awaleeky..
Me: fakkarteeny be baba, dayman lamma kan yet3assab ye2olly enty el sabab..
Her: la2 w mesh keda w bass..ana 3omry fe 7ayaty ma shoft 7add ye7ebb ye2agel el 7aga le a7'er el wa2t, w ye7ebb ennaha tetla3 100% perfect..
Me: deh lel asaf 7aga betet3ebny fe 7ayaty, bass it works!
Her: elly ana mest3'arbaloh, ennek bet7ebby te2aggly el 7aga..mesh betetzen2y maslan..la2 enty elly bet2aggely be mazagek..wel fel a7'er bet3rafy tetala3y el 7aga zay el foll..
Me: dah satr men Rabbena..
Her: la2 bass enty sha7'sytek 3'areeba..enty fe3lan be kaza sha7'sya, wel wa7ed lazem ye3mel 7esaboh 3ala keda..
Me: ew3y tekoony shayla menny wala 7aga..
Her: La2 7'alas..manty e3tazarty.
Me(Laughing): tab tamam keda..
Her: w e7keely ba2a ennek bet3'ayry ra2yek 17 marra fel sanya..ha3mel kaza, la2 mesh ha3mel, la2 ha3mel..erkazy keda ya mama..
Me: w ba3deeen ba2aaaa..a3mel eh fe nafsy tayeb.
Her: enty lazem tet3'yary..
Me:(giggling) 7adher..
Her: la2 begad, lazem te3'ary men nafsek..
Me:(impatiently) 7'alas..weslet..moken ba2a akkamel eraya 3ashan ashoof el ragel maat walla la2a?
Her: aho shofty alabty ezzay!
Me: la alabt wala 7aga..bass 7adher hab2a ashoof mawdoo3 a3'yar men nafsy dah..

For you a thousand times over

2008-07-08T09:56:00.000-07:00

There is only one sin, only one. And that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft. Do you understand that?When you kill a man, you steal a life. You steal his wife’s right to a husband, rob his children of a father.When you tell a lie, you steal someone’s right to the truth.When you cheat, you steal the right to fairness. Do you see?

-- Baba Sahib in The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseny

The Secret? More Like The Crap

2008-07-08T00:38:00.000-07:00

You know how this movie/book "The Secret" divided people into strictly strong believers of the concept behind it and others into believers of the fact this is just a load of crap? I belong to the second group of people. Allak laws of attraction aal.

Actually the basic idea is quite "impressive" if I must say. You could easily "fall for it": Think positively about what you want, surrender to the universe,(some crap about raising our consciousness level ), then POOF!, the "universe" will send you what you asked for.
Let it be a job, a car, a child, a wife, love or even a cup of coffee. The universe will send it to you.
What do we say in arabic? مكنش حد غلب
Then to patch all the holes in the story, and to defend their mechanism against people who say it doesn't work. They go on and tell you how you must not ask for something in "I WANT IT I WANT IT I WANT IT" way, but rather in one cool strong "I WANT IT" and then stop worrying about it. tab3an tab3an. Then you should try to love yourself, and forgive others while your at it. If it doesn't work? Then you have to let it go..don't wait for it to happen..inhale..forgive..exhale..thats' right.See..just a couple of years and hard work, and the job you've always wanted will come crawling to your feet.

The only thing I agree with and it is definitely something many people had told us about and it is not exclusive to the book is: The power of positive thinking. That is not a secret. We all know that. We all know that positive thinking makes you more content about yourself. We all know that positive thinking will help you even see the good in whatever bad goes your way.

I know that "the secret" is exposed and it is already old by now. But I was lazily watching a re-run for Oprah yesterday and it got on my nerves seeing all these PhD attained women so full of themselves selling this crap to people. Every time I see Oprah I remember why I wasn't watching for a long time.

Grief in a Scarred Heart.

2008-07-05T11:41:00.001-07:00

Right now my heart is aching. My deep feeling of pain and sorrow is beyond my capability of expressiveness. Life seems surreal and many things are suddenly out of proportion, while other stuff re-gained importance. Nothing has such an effect on our perspective of life like death.

There is no other way to put forth the bad news that some readers might already know except just saying it: My boss lost his 3 kids (ages ranging from 14 to 2) in a car accident last Thursday. They were heading for a weekend escape and Allah's will interfered with what they had planned. Miraculously, both my boss and his wife are in perfect shape. But of course not quite so. I can not comprehend or imagine what they must be feeling right now. Although I have been subconsciously trying to.

So the last three nights I was sleepless. I am never sleepless unless an earthquake hits. I kept on tossing and turning while my mind is slowly taking in the news. My mind was also searching for an explanation for what happened. Praying God to show those parents mercy and the wisdom behind His act.

Going to the funeral yesterday, was also a hard yet enlightening thing. I walked in a room full of tears, and saddness like it is in the air. But I have told myself that I will probably know the mother by being the one crying the most. And I was very wrong. I found her holding on more than I could ever imagine. Even capable of answering back what people have to say and thank them for coming. She like an angel. I found her not even "motamaska" but more of "mo2mena" be qadaa2 Allah. I heard my mom whispering in my ears "deh omm Rabbena estafaha begad. Deh akeed feeha 7aga mo7'talefa".

Although I already know a lot of people already praying for them,I ask readers to include those parents and their childern in your prayer. They need each and every one.

خناقة التكييف

2008-06-27T16:32:00.000-07:00

We fight all the time me and my 2 sisters. They are almost all trivial fights that can grow ugly. We never had heart-breaking fights, no major conflicts,and we had never been on non-speaking terms for more than 1 day. But we constantly have repetitive fights. Their intensity is dependent on many factors that are all out of the scope of this post (ma3lesh ana ba2aly fatra bakteb research papers, fal kalam too-formal 3ala el mawdoo3, bass eedy hatfok kaman shwaya).

The fights are quite funny when seen from the eyes of the outsider. Full of surreality, over-reacting and alsh. I don't quite know how we resolve them every time. But I guess we didn't. That is why we keep having the same fights over and over again.

We have this fight that I consider to be "generic", or rather representitive for all other fights. And that is خناقة التكييف

Okay(Quoting dee, when starting a new illustrative topic). You know how some people tend to feel cold than usual and others feel hot than usual? Well that is the main problem. My youngest sister, niveen, feels that the heat is unbearable. I, on the other hand, am very tolerant to heat, unless it is of course suffocating. So, and you might find this strange, I prefer to be حرانة than بردانة.
Also to my argument, takeef el ooda sootoh 3aly awy awy awy.I always feel that someone would be calling and I won't hear them. And it is also not installed properly so it mildly vibrates the near by window, which gives the effect of an earthquake.
Cherry is neutral. But the implicit rule in sister's fight is: If you are neutral then your job is to get on one of the quarrelling members nerves. In other words, a fight-catalyst. (mesh 3arfa ana bakteb kalam kebeer awy keda leeh, 7assah enny hakteb "conclusion" fel a7'er.)
So everyday, we have the same dialog at some point of the day:

Niveen: gjoe, efta7y el takeef law sama7ty.
Me(Staring at laptop non-responsive):..
Niveen: gjoe..GJOE!
Me: Na3am ya vonna 3ayza eh?
Niveen: OLTELEK EFTA7Y EL TAKEEF.
Me(responding slowly):tab kaman 5 da2aye2.
Niveen: la2 efta7eeh delwa2ty..ana kont fat7aah wenty afalteeh.
Me: Aywa 3ashan kont bardana
Niveen: wana 7arrana 7'alas mesh adra..eh el araf dah..
Me(non-responsive, probably reading a blog):..
Niveen: GIHAN!(yes, calling me in my first name, which is very threatening) EFTA7y el TAKEEF LAW SAMA7TY..
Me: Betza3a2y leeh..otloby el 7aga be 2osloob 3edel..
Niveen: ya salaaam! mana talabataha be 2osloob 3edel w marradeesh 3allaya..
Me: la2 oltelek estany 5 da2aye2..mesh 3ayza a2adeeha 7'ena2.
Niveen: gihan ana 7arrana!
Me: tab estany shwaya ya vonna begad..ana bab2a a3da ta7t el takeef 3ala tool w battaleg fe sa3etaha..awel lamma 7arrana hafta7oh.
Niveen: NA3AM! ya3ny kaman sana isA..gihan efta7y el takeef..
Me(in a cold tone): tab ta3aly efta7eeh enty.
Niveen: la2a.
Me: 7'alas..elly 3ayez 7aga ye3mlha..wana mesh 3ayza afta7 el takeef..
Niveen: enty bet3'allsy leeh?
Me: wenty mekkasela leeh te2oomy tefta7y el takeef?
Niveen: 3ashan enty orayeba mennoh..
Me: manty orayeba bardo
Niveen: bss enty a2rab..
Me: mesh far2a, enty elly 3ayza tefta7eeh..
Niveen: ya gihan ba2a!
Me(no response):
Niveen: gihan
Me:..
Niveen: gihan..
Me:...
Niveen:GIHAN!
Me: 3ayza eh?
Niveen: 3addet el 7'amas da2aye2..

So I open el takeef.
2 minutes later I close it again.
Niveen: eeeeeeeh! afalteeh leeh!!
Me: vonna, begad sootoh 3aly awy w bey7asesny enn feeh zelzal..
Niveen: ana 3omry mashoft 7add bey7'af men soot el takeef..
Me: Niveen begad 3ayza arrakez..heya 10 da2aye2 w hasblek el ooda..
Niveen: la2, eft7aeeh delwa2ty.
Me: Mesh haynfa3 3ashan ana lessa aflaah

(Cherry walks in)
Niveen: cherry, o7'tek mesh 3ayza tefta7 el takeef.
Cherry the catalyst: efta7y el takeef ya gjoe.
Me: cherry, begad beytalegny w sootoh 3aly..wana oltelaha kaman 10 da2aye2.
Niveen(talking to cherry): 3arfa fata7etoh men de2eteen bezzabt w afaletoh tany 3ala tool..
Cherry: gjoe, efta7y el takeef ya3ny 7aram 3aleeky el bent.
Me: cherry oltelha kaman 10 da2aye2 w hamshy..w kaman heya a3da mesh bet3mel 7aga..moken te2ra harry potter fe ayy 7etta tanya
Niveen: la2 ana 3ayza a2ra hena ba2a..
Me: aaah! borg el toor eshta3'al ba2a..
Niveen: ana 7orra..
Me: tayeb, yeb2a osbory kaman 5 da2aye2..
Niveen: aah, 3ashan te2feleeh ba3deeha be 30 sanya

Tab3an this convorsation is endless..Someone ends up freezing or melting. Or it is more like, someone walks out steaming from the room.Only to come back after a while and the fight re-begins.

And no, I am not afraid from soot el takeef. It is just annoying. Too annoying for me that makes me prefer the heat of June.

As a conclusion, we can all see that sisterly fights are an inevitable daily drama that you just have to live with. But they are above all silly, mostly with no right-and-wrong debates and fun to blog about.

Saved By the Deee

2008-06-25T00:49:00.000-07:00

So yesterday Dee literally saved my life. We were hanging out in Retro w a3deen fe amaan Allah..When suddenly Dee stretched her hand above my head and got out a tarzan-ish "AAaaaaAAA!" and stopped the newspapers stand from falling right on my head! It took me quite a while to understand what is happening. I mean fag2a el denya dallemet. I was paralyzed for a split of a second. Not in shock. But rather in "Heya deee bet3emel keda leh? ". Then when everything was clear and in the usual motion velocity, I stood up with a confused smile and helped to put the stand where it was!

El gameel fel mawdoo3, that I was just telling Dee 15 minutes before, that I was "concerned about the future"..I think I had a feeling that something was going to happen :D

We then jokingly suggested that we switch places, but then we were both afraid I will not respond as fast as Dee, if the stand fell again :D

Dee is a girl's best friend!

How a Geek would teach his kid the alphabets

2008-06-19T06:43:00.001-07:00

A for Array

B for Blog

C for Cast

D for Debug

E for Ebay

F for Facebook

G for Gmail

H for Hashing

I for Interface

J for Java

K for Kit

L for Limewire

M for Method

N for Nintendo

O for Override

P for Polymorphism

Q for Query

R for Routing

S for Swing

T Torrent

U for Ubunto

V VoIP

W for Wikipedia

X for XML (or XKCD)

Y for Yield

Z for Zip

What if..

2008-06-17T06:13:00.000-07:00

You know the hadeeth:

من حسن اسلام المرء تركه ما لا يعنيه
حديث حسن رواه الترمذي

Well, my father claims that it is ranked as one of the most important hadeeths recorded for our prophet (Peace Be Upon Him). Well, I was thinking today what if people took the hadeeth seriously. And when I say "people" I mean EVERYONE. What if people stopped nosing into other people's business? What if people did not waste all of thier effort on stuff that didn't matter to them? But for one thing, I admit I consider myself "curious" to some extent about what happens in other people's life. But I also think that almost everyone I know has problems with curiosity to one extent or another.

Back to my question, the first thing that came into my mind is the amount of people who "earn their living" from intruding others privacy. I mean if people decided to take this hadeeth into effect, there would be no papparazi,many magazines would have nothing to write about, no news feed on facebook, no gossips, no shows like the view and Tyra, and possibly half of the shows on Oprah, many personal blogging posts would not be interesting any more because it is other people's businsess that no one should care about. I am not sure if people would actually blog.

Then suddenly my thoughts concentrated on "facebook", and how contaminating it is if viewed from the hadeeth point of view.I mean 99.99% of any facebooker time is checking other people's news. Whether it is photos, groups joined, status updates, who-wrote-on-who's wall, who-commented-on-who's photo, who became a fan of ninja turtles. I mean the social network idea is so powerful, i gradually started to believe that it is so misued Everybody knows in their heart that facebook is a waste of time. "But it's "fun" to see what people chose to share about their lives. People share only what they want to share",they think to themselves.

Still again my thoughts went back to the hadeeth..and the term "من حسن اسلام" specifically. The phrase I believe is "iniviting" if you must say for a Muslim to embrace such an attribute. It is like when someone tells you something is "preferable" in contrast to it being "obligatory".
Maybe I will try to be less curious about other people's business. At least it would make me more focused on the important stuff in my life, like you know, checking my mail.

P.S: I am not considering re-de-activating my facebook account, at least not after I get my "happy birthday" on the wall :P. But it is an idea worth pondering.

دعاء

2008-06-15T23:35:00.000-07:00

رب اشرح لي صدري ويسر لي أمري و احلل عقدة من لساني يفقهه قولي

اللهم لك أسلمت و بك امنت و عليك توكلت و بك خاصمت و اليك حاكمت فاغفر لي ما قدمت و ما أخرت و ما أسررت و ما أعلنت
أنت المقدم و أنت المؤخر لا اله الا أنت عليك توكلت
وأنت رب العرش الكريم

Doing The Right Thing

2008-06-13T04:42:00.000-07:00

Sometimes doing the right thing does not make one feel any better. But it has to be done after all.

Sbelling Mistakes

2008-06-10T14:13:00.000-07:00

I have to admit that I have terrible spelling capablities. I will write this post as is. No corrections.I will not rely on firefox's spelling checking and you would see for yourself how bad my spelling can be. Not to menton the grammer mistakes I does sometimes.

I'll write a very random sequence of sentences including words that I ALWAYS misspell.

"I think I will have a permenent problem with spelling. I think it is asocciated with the fact that I type fast and have someone to clean up the mess I left behind.The spelling mistakes usually acsend in complixity and frequency as I go on. Generally speaking, my spelling mistakes have certain characterstics. It is always almost about missing a vowel or transposing 2 letters."

"I get bored very easy. and one of my fatal flaws is that I have no committiment towards anything I should do. I have no daily usefull habits. I could never take a certain medication for more than 2 days, I occasuoinly wear my retainer and it took me 4 years to be on the seriuos track to get my driver's lisence. I admit that it is a pychological-related probelm. I immediatly think to myself that "it's boring to continue like this for long."Or the consquences of not doing what I am supposed to do is not drastic so I just don't .Yeah I know, it is such a not very beuatiful habit (elmafrood a2ool ugly habit, bass i don't misspell ugly.) "

Other words I mispell w ma3reftesh a7ottaha fe gomal mofeeda:
heirearchy
asocciated
priveleges
illisiuion
diabtes
specfication
advice or advise? feeh wa7da noun wel tanya verb
methodolgy
whether/weather/wheather
thier

P.S.: I am seriuosly considering not to always proofread some of my posts for the fun of it. The Post is almost entirly underlined!

Envy

2008-06-07T08:57:00.001-07:00

I admit. I am totally envious of the American people. Not because they have half a continent just for themselves, not because they have the greatest variety of junk food, not because they have all the big software houses, not because they are the home of great blockbuster movies, not because they actually have a witness protection program, not because they made us a lot of sitcoms that re-set our moods and great minds that re-defined our future, not because they have the top universities, not because they never say "za" instead of "the".No.None of that.

I envy the American people for simply having a presidential election in which almost no one could predict its outcome. (still, my theory of mas7'am-men-setty-kallef-ya-seedy holds.)

Weird

2008-06-05T14:07:00.000-07:00

Don't you think its weird that many people think they are lonely when its too crowded? I mean what are all these people doing? Just making it more uncomfortable being alone?

Don't you think its weird that there are many people struggling with overweight and dieting when there is a global food crisis? (I am not judging, I am contemplating)

Don't you think its weird that although you have friends whom you see come online and offline everyday and you are listed as friends on facebook still the distance between you is almost incompressible?(What is this geeky word doing up here)

Don't you think its weird that people still watch real TV? As if all the drama, backstabbing, conflict and struggling we have in our real lives,is not enough. I thought people watch TV to see some fiction, to escape real life, not to replace it with watching others pretend to have lives.

Don't you think it's weird that Obama won the elections? I thought it would be Hillary at start. yalla, mas7'am men setty, kallef ya seedy :D

Don't you think it's weird that three posts before this one I said that I was going to write about spelling mistakes and still haven't?

I think it's weird.

I love this conversation

2008-06-05T09:49:00.000-07:00

...because it's bitter sweet :)

From the Ocean's Eleven Movie (abl lamma yektaroh w yellemoh)

"

      Tess Ocean sits in a booth and sips at a glass of wine
     and checks her watch: Benedict is late or very close to
     being so...


     ... when a pair of hands slips over her shoulders and
     starts to caress her arms.

                                  TESS
                          (without looking at him)
                  You're thirty seconds late. I was
                  about to send out a search
                  party...
                         (recognizing the hands,
                           she turns, stunned)
                  Danny...

                                 DANNY
                          (standing over her,grinning)
                  Hello, Tess.

                                 TESS
                          (thrilled and petrified
                          and stunned to see
                          him, but outraged
                          mostly)
                  What are you doing here?

                                 DANNY
                   I'm out.

                                 TESS
                   You're out.

                                 DANNY
                   Of prison. You remember. The day
                  I went for cigarettes and never
                  came back. You must have noticed.

                                  TESS
                   I don't smoke.
                         (as he sits)
                  Don't sit --

                                 DANNY
                          (but he does)
                  They said I'd paid my debt to
                  society.

                                 TESS
                   Funny, I never got a check.

       Danny smiles.    Tess stares daggers.

                TESS                      DANNY
        You can't stay.                   It's good to see you.


                                 DANNY
                   You're not wearing your ring.

     A beat.

                                TESS
                   I sold it. And I don't have a
                  husband. Or didn't you get the
                  papers?

                                 DANNY
                   My last day inside.

                                 TESS
                   I told you I'd write.

     Danny reaches his hand (ringed) for hers (ringless), but
     she removes it from the table.

                                   TESS
                   Danny.   Go.   Now. Before...

                                   DANNY
                   Benedict?

     She freezes: Danny knows.       He smiles:   it's okay.   Then,
     to a passing waiter:

                                  DANNY
                          (his fingers two
                          inches apart)
                  Whiskey and --
                         (then one inch
                          apart)
                  -- whiskey.

                                   TESS
                   Danny...

                                 DANNY
                   You're doing a great job curating
                  the museum.

     She sighs, exasperated.

                                 DANNY
                   The Vermeer is quite good. Simple
                  but vibrant. Although his work
                  definitely fell off as he got
                  older.

                                 TESS
                   Remind you of anyone?

<-Boring part skipped->
                                 DANNY
                   You don't know how many times I
                  played this conversation out in my
                  head the last two years.

                                 TESS
                   Did it always go this poorly?

                                  DANNY
                   Yes.

                                 TESS
                   Sounds frustrating.

                                 DANNY
                   You were never easy.
                         (as she shrugs)
                  Okay. I'll make this quick. I came
                  here for you. I'm gonna get on with
                  my life, and I want you with me.

                                 TESS
                   You're a thief and a liar.

                                 DANNY
                   I only lied about being a thief.
                  But I don't do that anymore.

                                  TESS
                   Steal?

                                  DANNY
                   Lie.

                                 TESS
                   I'm with someone now who doesn't
                  have to make that kind of
                  distinction.



                                 DANNY
                   No, he's very clear on both.

                                  TESS
                   Nice.   Work on that for two years, too?

                                 DANNY
                   Year and a half.

     A light smile from Tess.

                                 TESS
                   Do you know what your problem is?

                                 DANNY
                   I only have one?

                                 TESS
                   You've met too many people like you.
                         (then)
                  I'm with Terry now.

                                 DANNY
                   Does he make you laugh?

                                 TESS
                   He doesn't make me cry.

Questions

2008-06-04T13:56:00.000-07:00

In a pathetic attempt yesterday to cheer myself up, I went to ma3rad el nady to buy some stuff.I could not exactly remember what I bought and I wasn't looking for anything specific and I was rather searching-in my head- for answers to questions that somehow crept into my mind without invitation.

Suddenly I am feeling a terrible urge of wanting to talk to Geddo.I never talked about how empty and hollow my grandparents home became after Geddo passed away. I terribly need geddo, I need to talk to him, to listen to him assuring me that everything is going to be okay.

Alone. Why do I feel so alone when I am not? Why do I feel that no one cares when I am surrounded by good friends and a wonderful family?Why do I feel very bitter towards strangers? I have no idea why I felt so mean today towards just normal people walking the streets.I feel terribly lost although I know exactly where I am going. How do I feel exhausted and tired when I haven't yet started? I so want someone who I can speak my mind and heart out to without being judged, without being misunderstood, without someone telling me to stop crying because its useless. Anyone I'll talk to would either get worried because they care, or they would pretend to be listening because they could not care less w koll wa7ed feeh elly mekafeeh. Why do I feel that I want to be left alone and at the same time hate the fact that there is no one I can talk to without worrying about consequences even the most trivial ones?Why do I hate being vulnerable even infront of who I consider to be my comfort zone?

I also I have no idea why these questions are asked and they either have obvious answers or no answers at all. But I feel that this is deeper than just a bad mood. There is something out of balance. Something I might be avoiding confrontation with. Yeah, that's right. Feeh 7aga tanya medy2any and am not dealing with it. I just hope I think I know what it is.

Today also I intentionally lost my temper at work.I did not lose my temper. I just showed people that I will not cover up anyone's mistake and I definitely won't take blame for not backing up any coworker's incompetencies.I am not going to be blamed specially that I acted like a big girl and took full responsibility for it. I am willing to pay the price of someone's 2 consecutive mistakes, and I am beng blamed for not taking account for them in the first place. WHATEVER!
(What happened at work has nothing to do with how I feel right now)

Am very likely to delete this post lamma arga3 men el sho3'l. It is getting on my nerves

Tagged: 6 Quirks

2008-06-02T07:14:00.000-07:00

Tagged by my the female thinking out loud, Sou

These are the rules:

1. Link the person(s) who tagged you.
2. Mention the rules on your blog.
3. State 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag 6 following bloggers.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

Quirks:

1- I continuously sleep on my laptop..w ba7ees enn el na7ya el yemeen arya7 men el na7ya el shemal.

2-My next post would be about spelling meskates.

3-I still bit my nails.Actually my nails look very boyish. One of my wishes is that before I die, I would have decent nails like any normal girl my age..

4-The last scary movie I saw (I think) was The Ring. I might have seen another one ba3deeh, bass I totally blocked it out.The reason I hate scary movies is that most of the time I would be the only one awake at home late at night.

5-The last time I had driving lessons I almost hit a kid, I accidentally hunked instead of stepping on the brakes.That was exactly 4 years ago.I'll re-start new driving lessons tomorrow isA :)

6- When engaged in a group conversation.I don't look to the talker, I'd rather watch people listening to the talker.If someone is saying something stupid, I'll most probably look at the other listeners to see how they took it. The subtle facial expressions they make are hilarious!

Tagging: Dee, M@hdeto, Insomniac , Cesario, Mermaid and Zero!

P.S: I felt like this tag was very similar to the 1o random things tag, I actually wrote a couple of points there then I removed them because I felt like I have wrote them somewhere..w ba3deen the things I wrote are not quirky enough, I think i am Quirkier than that, bass ana mesh merrakeza..

Surprise!!!!

2008-05-31T13:56:00.000-07:00

Partners in Crime: Dee, Xero, Arima, Cognitive, Embee, Silent Observer and DaySleepeer

It's not extraordinary..but I hope it would give you faith that good things will happen to you isA :)

Random Thought

2008-05-31T05:58:00.000-07:00

What if I am supposed to be doing something like totally different from what I am doing? What if I am supposed to be a doctor, writer, poet, rock climber, biologist or even a cooking show hostess?

What if I am like totally wasting my time on something really not my best area..How do I know that I have an undiscovered passion or talent in something ?(I tried singing, and it didn't work, so don't even go there)..

These were just speculations I had while studying a subject I am soooo not comfortable with..

Last One

2008-05-30T03:33:00.000-07:00

Hopefully this would be the last post I ever write about Exams..isA Rabbena haystor w te3addy 3ala 7'eer...

El mafrood enn el maddah deh as3ab madda 7'ataha el sanady..ya3ny zay mat2ooloh keda mesk el 7'etam..bass isA Rabbena haystor w te3addy 3ala 7'eer..

It's 2 days till my final final..and it's also 2 days till June..My favorite Month of The Year :)

Although throughout June I would be working on my pre-masters project, but I don't mind at all..actually I am looking forward to it..Anything instead of studying!

So i'll just have to hang in there for 2 more days and all of this will be behind my back..isA Rabenna haysotor w t3addyd 3ala 7'eer..

A Grateful Post

2008-05-28T13:39:00.000-07:00

El7amdolellah.This what I should be saying for a long time.El7amdolellah I had a good day today..After many days of disappointments and frustration, boredom and loneliness.

So today, started with an exam.Naturally my biological clock was mixed up because of caffiene, distorted sleeping hours and stupid dreams. Just before the exam started the doctor came and told us, "The exam has an official 3 hour.But I have designed a 1 hour exam.You can take all the time you want, but I am telling you it is a short and easy exam" . I was thinking "Great! My brain cells will keep functioning for 1 more hour anyway". The doctor was right.It was an easy to-the-point exam, yet it was a differentiator(Smart doctor, one of my best 3ammatan). Despite my stupid stupid stupid mistake in the exam, I did fine el7amdolellah..and was 2nd to hand in the paper.I was ecstatic to get it over with too quickly. Lately, I have been having this stupid habit of mine of studying really hard the night before the exam, by the time it starts I feel tired to solve it.

Then since a very long time bardo, I went out with old friends. At last I have seen Sina! She has really good disappearing powers. So going out with her along with other college freinds was really refreshing.In an instant, we dropped the attitude of being all-grown-ups with our 9-to-5 jobs and acted really silly, while everybody in the restaurant was watching!

So far so good..Then I went with Sina to see Iron Man. Now this is a really good movie. My sister claims that I loved it merely because I had frequent disappointments,but I beg to differ.It was in fact enjoyable and highly recommended by many :)

I spent most of the time in the movie shabtana fe kamm el Gadgets!Throughout the movie I kept telling sina "Ana 3ayza menndah ya 7ozombol".I mean if you intentionally lowered your IQ level to that of an ancient human being, you could actually think that this is a credible super hero. I'll be honest with you and myself:I like hi-tech movies. I was indeed impressed by this one. And then there is Gwyneth Paltrow. All she had to do is wear high heels, a formal dress, a pony tail and smile.

Then I came home to find my sisters in a surprisingly good mood given that they have an exam tomorrow (pray for them) and I also read a couple of posts that really made me feel content.

El7amdolellah for today. Cause you know what, this too shall pass, and I will enjoy it while it lasts.

Childhood dilemma, Solved!

2008-05-26T20:21:00.000-07:00

I always had this question as a kid.

But not any more..I feel like I have missed loads of fun though..

بلدنا بتقدم بينا

2008-05-26T14:03:00.000-07:00

So this year we ranked 69/140 countries in the GPI, or the Global Peace Index..I liked the criteria...but i really haven't read how they actually measure them..bass maslan we got( On a scale from 1-5, 1=most peaceful):

Level of distrust in other citizens, 3/5
Political Instability, 3.5/5
Relations with neighboring countries, 2
Likelihood of violent demonstration 3/5
Political Democracy Index, 3.9

...and many many more interesting criteria!

ah, 3ala fekra..i deliberately put the criteria that we were bad in, not for any specific reason other than to make the post more interesting..bass we ranked good in other stuff like ..like..organized crime (1) masalan and education percentage(93%).

MASR, MASR..TA7YA MASR!

5 Most Peaceful countries:
Iceland (go figure)
Denmark
Norway
New Zealand
Japan

5 Least Peaceful countries:
Israel
Afghanistan
Sudan
Somalia
Iraq

See the whole list here

P.S.:USA got the 97th rank..

Change is the only permanent thing.

2008-05-23T04:39:00.000-07:00

She might not know this,but Juka's post on "This too shall pass" had a tremendous effect on my perspective in life.

Nothing stays the same. No one will stay for ever, no pain will last, no joy will reside. Everything changes. Whether its the good times, the bad times, the ugly times. It will all pass..and the only fact of life that remains unchanged is change itself.
This might be something we already know at the back of our heads because its intuitive. But let me explain how it changed my perspective in life.

Whenever something good happens to me I start appreciating it and valuing it more because I know it won't last forever. I also think that I should be grateful to Allah for this specific blessing as long as I am having it.Before I came to this realization of "everything changes", whenever something good happens, I used to come to the conclusion that "life is great, everything is perfect and from what it seems, it will be perfect for a long while".Yeah, that's what I used to think.
Now I think I am just in a "good phase" and I might as well thank my Lord as much as I can before things change.

Whenever something bad happens to me, I start consoling myself by saying it won't last forever. There will be happier times yet to come..I have to be patient until it goes away.And I might as well learn from the pain accompanying it. And as short as my life is, I already got the lesson that pain is almost only there for us to learn from it, and to make us stronger.

I became more content with the joys of life,and less depressed by the trauma it brings sometimes.

It is all the same with things around me. I don't jump into the conclusion that certain people are happy and doing well in life and others are sad and el denya mellatasha ma3ahom.I realize that what I see is just a snapshot in time and things are very likely to change for either, because it always does.

و تلك الايام ندوالها بين الناس

It's like sometimes a person enters a hospital and becomes deluded that everyone in life is sick and that life is full of pain,diseases and suffering.And another one might enter a restaurant and think that everybody seems to be happy, in love, together wel 7ayah bamby bamby..
That is absurd and a totally narrow perspective of things.I used to think that way, and I was under the illusion that some people are just happy and others are just sad. Life does not work that way. Everybody takes their turn.That's why life seems to be unfair.It is because you compare yourself or 2 people at different phases in life, thinking that things will stay like this for both forever.It's our judgment that is not fair comparing apples with oranges.

I think it is a good lesson in life not to be arrogantly happy by the good stuff happening to you and never be devastated by the bad stuff,because nothing is permanent.

Enough philosophy for one day. I will save it for the exam answer sheet paper.

Vodafone Commerical

2008-05-20T17:15:00.000-07:00

ايه احلى حاجة في النهاردة؟

انه خِلص

انا عندي امتحانات ابتدأُُُ من يوم الاحد الجي ان شاء الله..ده طبعا معناه اني هابلوج زيادة عن المعدل الطبيعي و ذلك لأن البلوجينج ايام الامتحانات له طعم خاص لما يصحبه من مشاعر تأنيب الضمير و ندم و هروب من الواقع المرير

و الان اترككم مع رائعة علاء ولي الدين الناظر مصحوبا بترجمة للانجليزية

25 things to do that would make your ordinary day more interesting

2008-05-18T09:23:00.000-07:00

Everyday could be a special day in numerous ways..It just needs a bit of creativity and
time to come up with some ideas. Well, I came up with a medium-sized list of things that
hopefully would make any boring day of yours a lot more interesting.

1- Call an old friend that called you a couple of times and you havent called back. Blame
them for not calling and checking on you. The conversation could take interesting turns.

2- Get dressed, find a busy street and try crossing the road a couple of times back and
forth.Try to intentionally cross the street infront of microbuses and CTAs..(Praying el
Fard be Fardo is a prequisite for this one. Its is also adviced to give a warm group-hug
to your family)

3- Smile at strangers in the street.But be selective.This could be dangerous. If someone
smiled back, put on the blank face suddenly.

4- Get the newspaper and read it loudly in the street, or if you are stuck at traffic,
open up the windows and start reading. Perfect newspaper: El dostoor beta3 yoom larba3

5- While watching TV with your family(some movie on channel 2 for the 4th time) read the
subtitles out loudly in a cartoonish tone(aaaaa..ma hatha ya saa7). Dont stop until there are serious threats.

6- This is fun at work or college: Put your mobile in your pocket and then pretend you
lost it. Get up and try searching for it, panic, and aggressivly ask people to join your
quest(Fezz oom dawar ma3aya ya bany2adaam). After 20 minutes of searching, when someone
asks the stupid question of "Tab shofteeh fe gebeek?", Check your pocket, put an innocent
smile on your face and say: "Ah aho la2eetoh"..Sit down and avoid eye contact.

7-(I actually tried this one) In the club, find a small kid who is dressed in his/her
training suit and heading for el tamreen..talk to him/her and ask them about themselves
,their school and their dreams.Encourage them to have a bright future in whatever sports
they are practicing and ask for their name because they are going to be famous in the next
10-15 years. If you have the time, introduce them to your imaginary friend.

8- Send an email to your friends/coworkers with an attached sketch of your plan to rob the
bank from which you get your salary.

9- Try writing a song and ask your family or friends-of-your-friends about what they think
about it. But first say its a symbolic song and has a hidden meaning. You should have
something written like Adel Emam's "El7alazoona, el7alazoona, yamma 3ala el 7alazoona".
Ask them when your done if they got the hidden meaning and if they don't, be very
disappointed. If they think they figured out what the symbol is, play along.

10-Play "Bedoon Kalam" with some friends.The movie in question should be "The eternal
sunshine of a spotless mind" or "The secrets of the ya-ya sisterhood"..or it could be a
short arabic name like "7eena Maysara" or "Kalashenkoof".

11-Say you have friends X,Y and Z. Send an email to X that was supposed to be sent to Y
blabbering about Z. They don't necessary have to know each other. The less they know each
other the meaner your email can be, the more fun you have.

12- Divert all your calls to someone you recently had a fight with.

13- Go to Google.com and then start typing "Serial Killers", " Extinct-Threated Animals",
"How to make a bomb at home","Deadly Hurricanes and the friendly Names behind
them","PanCake Reciepe", "Human Cloning". Check a few links, print the results and
distribute them among your friends. Improvise when someone asks what are these for.

Or:

14- Find a really really depressed friend,who has just told you how sick they are of their
life. Google "10 ways to commit suicide creatively" and Forward them the results.
Make a Group on facebook titled ": RIP..we will never forget you, nor the way
you died".

16- Create an event on Facebook "Watching Monday's Movie Premier: Hantffarag kollena 3ala
el film elly haygebooh..w hankol we7na bentfarag". Make it a weekly event.

17- Go to a pet store.Head for a favorite animal of yours and start talking to them(As in
really talking). This works best when you have something that you need to get out of your
system and have no one to complain it too.

18- Make a 10-leveled club sandwich. Take some pictures of it, and put it on your blog.

19- Start an extremely debatable conversation in an outing,and play the devil's advocate.
At the end of the outing, accelarate the heat of the conversation and decide that you
have to go because you can't believe that your friends are thinking that way. Stand up
,and go. Send an sms after you have left saying that you are punishing them for the way of
thinking by making them pay for what you had. Only then you could be friends again.

20- Try to memorize your favorite song backwards. Brag about it all day long and ask
people to sing along.If you can't sing, humm.

21- If you have enough credit, send to people of your personal choice any of following
smses:
A-"Na3eebo Zamanona Wal 3aybo Feena..w Laysa lel Zaman 3aybon Sewana "
B-"Today is the first day of the rest of your life, unless you die today ofcourse."
C-"Beware what you wish for."
D-"Hat2olhomly Nelly, Nelly..Ha2olhomlak Sherihan Sherihan."
E-"Do some good today. "

22- If you are sitting among people you know on your computer or laptop suddenly look up
and say "What was that sound?"..Look attentive,and then after 5 more seconds say "Did you
hear that?".Repeat.

23-Wear something that you hate. Something that makes you fatter, shorter, or just doesnt
look good on you. You would probably find it in deep dark corner in your closet. Complain
about how bad you look in this.Perfect for the start of the week.Or you could wear eye-
irritating mismatching colors. (Recommendation: Green/Red-- The water melon effect.)

24- I resisted trying this in the metro:
Get out your closed-cell and pretend to have a fight over the phone.

25- Add some items to this list or make up your own list.

Have an interesting day.

One Last Time..

2008-05-17T12:33:00.000-07:00

Although I am still in contact with a close circle of friends from college, I still feel like I want our big "reunion" in our delayed graduation party. I never thought it was a big deal and wasn't very excited about it until very lately when I, out-of-the-blue, felt like I need a closure for college days..

عايزة جراديواشن بارتييييييي

Quote

2008-05-14T11:57:00.000-07:00

"There must be more to life than having everything."
-- Maurice Sendak

I have no idea who he is. But he is absolutely right.

My daily fix

2008-05-13T10:34:00.000-07:00

Cilantro happens to be 3 minutes away from home, and 2 minutes away from where I currently work. At last, I became a recognizable face at both, and I can actually tell the waiter ," I want the usual please". That is: Guatemala coffee, Latte with skimmed milk and no flavor.

The Only Thing

2008-05-10T14:48:00.001-07:00

The only thing I hate about my life is that I am not living it the way I should. I disappoint myself too often.

Lebanon

2008-05-10T02:03:00.000-07:00

The situation in Lebanon is really sad. And you know what is getting on my nerves? I found that they are still airing that stupid Star Academy. Yeah, that's right..we just need one more air-head singer and all our problems are solved.

The Rules of Fake Dieting

2008-05-06T13:24:00.000-07:00

Diet is simple logic:( Daily Calorie Intake< Daily Calories Burned)= Loss in Weight. We all know this fact. And anyone who went on a diet would know how it feels to count the calories, and get on everyone's nerves but mostly yourself.

You know those Diets that are DOA? The ones which you give in at the sight of the first temptation? These are the funniest diets I believe. They are attempts if you must say, but they are still diets..because you are still counting and keeping track of what you are eating, but you are missing the part where you actually have to eat less.

So, with the help of family, friends and experience, I have developed certain rules for fake dieting. Rules that justify why we are not dieting as we should.Rules that guide you to know exactly what to count and what to,you know, intentionally ignore..and have a good reason for it while doing so. =)

The rules are:

1- If you are eating and nobody is watching,it doesn't count.
2- If you are not paying,it doesn't count.(agblek shokalata?)
3- If you are eating off your friend's plate, it doesn't count.(Wareeny adoo2 dah keda)
4- If you don't know the exact ingredients of the meal, it doesn't count.
5- If you are eating something for the first time, it doesn't count.(Esmoh eh olteely?)
6- Ice-cream in winter doesn't count.
7- If you are eating directly off the fridge, it doesn't count.
8- If you are eating standing up, it doesn't count.
9- If it is a drink, it doesn't count.(I'll have this mocha to-go law sama7t)
10-If you don't like the taste of what you are eating, it doesn't count.
11- If you are eating in the car it doesn't count.
12- If someone 7elef 3aleek yemeen tala2 la takol, it doesn't count.
13- Deliveries leftovers that are cold and already lost their taste don't count (Ana feteret ba2eet el McRoyal elly kaltooh embare7 w kasselt assa7'anoh)
14- If you are eating when you are really really really angry, it doesn't count. ( Dah EH EL ARAF DAH..ENTY 3'AWYA MASHAKEL W 7'ALAS!! NAWLEENY EL KATCHAB.)

Now that the rules are set..you have no excuse to be on a diet for a lifetime.

P.S: I read this in Cilantro's mag: Banging your head on the wall for an half-hour burns 150 calories..

Great News Wrapped in Saddening Circumstances

2008-05-03T02:16:00.000-07:00

A couple of days ago, I woke up on great news.I was really really relieved. Sami el Hajj is OUT!After 6 years of Guantanamic suffering , he was finally released. I remember praying for the guy a couple of times. I mean really praying for the guy.Almost nothing in this world is saddening as first-degree injustice.

Then when I actually watched the news at Al-Jazeera, and saw how he was carried by soldiers because he was too weak, and how he was transported right away to the hospital for his health condition, and how much weight he lost, due to hunger strikes..I felt..I felt..I felt angry, frustrated but happy that things will hopefully get better for him.

Then I heard him speak.. with such heavenly perseverance, something out of this world really. I was impressed. He is a living example of strong will.I would never forget the sparkle in his weary eyes, the strength in his weak voice, nor the sadness in his smile. You could not help but respect the guy and wish that we had more like him.I mean no wonder he got locked up.

Although I never heard Al-Hajj speak before, but I got the feeling that imprisonment changed him. Of course it did, but what went through my mind was that 6 years ago maybe the only thing that was of his focus is how to make a living, build up a career,or pursuit an exciting shot worth putting in the news. But now, I believe that he would have a wider perspective of things, more important issues on his minds, more enemies and simply a different life a head of him. But none of that is anything other than speculations of distant viewer.Overall, I think and hope that he got the best out of this situation, although the word "situation" is a terrible understatement.

You could watch a video Here, read more about it Here and Here.

A lesson learned over Sham El-Neseem

2008-04-28T14:21:00.000-07:00

"The more effort people exert trying to project a certain image, the less this image is reflective of what they truly behold."
-- gjoe.

MultiTasking

2008-04-25T15:27:00.000-07:00

dammit

2008-04-23T09:31:00.000-07:00

عليا جنيه و ربع و مش فاكرة لمين

Learn Dee..LEARN!

2008-04-22T22:54:00.000-07:00

Dragging Myself To Work

2008-04-22T22:10:00.000-07:00

I always have initiation issues.Starting any task is always not easy for me. It doesn't matter whether it's a phone call or a presentation that I have to prepare, whether it's reading a book or even organizing my desk. As long as I have the notion of "waraya 7aga a3melha" I always postpone what it is I have to do. It's not that I don't do it eventually, but I don't start doing it until I am really option-less. I know people who think "Start doing what you have to do to get it over with". I don't think that way. The way I think is more like "Why do it now when I can do it afterwards?"

These days specifically, I have a dragging-myself-to-work problem. This is should not be the case since I very much like my new work place. It's quiet, but not boring,I am barely distracted, ,I am very productive and it is 2 minutes away from Cilantro.Why do I dread going to work every morning, I have no idea. But what I am sure of is that I go to work late from 1-2 hours everyday, just because I don't feel like it, and that I will still stay up late in any case..So, "Why go now when I'll finish what it is I have to do anyways?".

Just 2 days ago, I was up and doing some work from 4 am in the morning. When it was time to get ready for work, I got dressed up and then slept on the couch for 1 hour.I woke up, didn't like what I was wearing so I changed. This bought me another 30 minutes. I am totally aware that subconsciously, I did that so that I won't go to work on time.

When my co-worker asked me why was I late, I replied "Ra7et 3allaya nooma".

P.S:You might wonder how do I get away with going late at work.Feen el beeh el modeer? Well, the thing is he told us that there is no "strict" office hours.He doesn't come every day and when he does, it's not before 3. But theoretically speaking, we should come from 9 to 5.

Wondering..

2008-04-20T23:25:00.000-07:00

I was wondering; To what extent is a person responsible for the state of things around him? I mean things are not looking good, right?Neither globally nor locally.. But again, what does an "individual" has to do to make things better? How far is one contributing to the well-being of his surrounding environment? Where does someone stop?Is it enough to set a good example? Or do we have to work in groups to set a significant change?How much damage is done to have people who are believers in "hopeless case" and that things would never get better? How much damage is done if we had people who simply chose to shut up about the wrong they see everyday?Is it enough to be a person who is كافي خيره شره?

For example, it gets more crowded everyday; If I bought a new car, won't that have a negative effect on traffic jams?Global warming?But it is more serious than just that.

What my question really is: Individually speaking,How 'significant' a change has to be?

Quitting

2008-04-12T11:45:00.000-07:00

Today, I've quit trying. It feels awful.

Zamaan Wana So3'yar

2008-04-08T15:34:00.000-07:00

I figured something very very recently: Nothing makes me genuinely content but a revived childhood memory. El7amdolellah, I enjoy one of life's greatest blessings: A happy childhood. Well, as a first child, you get all the attention and all that, your parents always have the highest expectations, which sometimes could turn into a curse. But overall, again, el7amdolellah I had a very nice time being a kiddo!

When I truly recall zaman, with all it's habal, carefree and innocence, it feels like I am little girl back again..it's like all the surrounding dullness and burdens disappear. I could find myself smiling while stuck in traffic, or giggling while a manager gives direct orders of not exceeding a deadline.

I discovered that looking at some of my childhood photos could really lift my spirit up. Which is greatly needed these days!Tab3an if I was flipping through my old photos with my sisters or mom they would have to say the lame-statement "Eh elly 7assalek ya oojy?", and I have to reply in a snobbish attitude "wala 7aga, I turned from a 3ayela into a diva".

That thing on my face? Grown-ups call it Shalfatah, Kids call it Chocolate

So I decided, that every now and then I will share bits of these memories through my humble blog! heeeeh :)

And today I share this:

Zamaaaan wna so3'ayara,I was such a hyperactive kid..and naturally i didn't like bed-time.So my parents invented the "sleeping routine":a game, that they have to go through every night 3ashan at7'emed..wana tab3an amma sadda2at..

kan lazem koll yoom baba yo3od 3ala rokaboh w yemedd eedoh w yestanany fe awel el salah, wana agry men a7'erha w a2olloh "Tesba7 3ala 7'eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa babaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" in a whale-ish-kinda-way watremy fe 7odnoh! w tab3an 3ashan ana mesh 3ayza anam, I had to repeat it a coupla times, and practice it on mom just to get it right..w marra abbata2 el tempo w marra assar3o 3ashan el ta3'yeer..
My mom had to watch carefully and clap for me as I ran..if she is not looking, then I had to do it again!

You could unmistakably conclude that I have certain illusions that I am the center of the universe until this moment.

Every now and then, my dad jokes that I stopped playing that game. "Battalty tegry 3allaya w te2oleely tesba7 3ala 7'eer ya baba"...
I usually reply by saying, "Tesba7 3ala 7'eer"

I feel SOO much better :)
El7amdolellah!

One lousy movie..

2008-04-05T13:53:00.001-07:00

..after another, after another!For 3 consecutive times of movie-goings, I was greatly disappointed..First by There will be blood, then by Geneenet El-Asmak and the least disappointment was Share3 18 because I didn't have any high expectations anyway!

Okay let's talk details..There will be blood felt like a remake of "the good the bad and the ugly"..Not in the plot, but in the pace..It was extremely slow and you feel really disconnected from the people. You could not find any justifications for what they do and why they behave. But I'd have to applause for Daniel's Performance..I haven't seen the other nominated actors but he sure did deserve an academy award.

Geneenet El-Asmak..The movie was also very very slow(slow is in you could spend 3 minutes watching a guy walking in the street, or tying his shoes, or making a cup of tea), but it was kinda new. You feel like the director has a vision and wants to say something..you are just not quite sure what it is!Actually no, it was quite obvious that the movie was talking about fear.And he wants to deliver a message that we as a society are collectively and individually living in fear.Fear from the future, from pain, from loneliness, from rejection, from exposing our real selves, from the government even..At this part, the movie was good at portraying different specs of the society..and what each and everyone is afraid of. But still, he was not able to sell his idea, and it was very symbolic at times to be understood! At many points of the movie, you could just hear the audience make fun of how slow the things are..There is no usual story climax and resolution..I remember quite well when the 2 hours were almost over and the audience felt like "enough already" , yet nothing really dramatic happened, a guy behind us was like "Ana mesh 3aref leeh 7ases enn el film hay7'las 3ala keda" and he was correct! It did end 2 seconds after his prediction.

Share3 18: Okay, it was available fel nady with a 5-pounds ticket and the movie was 75 mins long..you can't really blame me for watching it.
Anyways, I appreciate the attempt of making a "detective" plot and all that, but the director was terrible terrible terrible.The dialog was "rakeek" to the moon and back ..And someone please kill Mays 7amdan in real life..She just gets on my every nerve..Me-2avowara mel a7'er..Dah 3'eer enn the movie was very predictable. You could easily see through it..I need to do some mental math to get my IQ level back to normal.

Feen ayyam el aflam el 7elwa, Braveheart walla The Shawshank Redemption, walla Sleepless in Seattle,walla Pocahontas 7atta..

When short-termed memory interfers with your work

2008-03-31T18:12:00.000-07:00

I've been continuously asked by manager to bring some papers,and I have been continuously forgetting about it.Until Yesterday.Not so much fun.

When short-termed memory turns dangerous

2008-03-31T16:19:00.000-07:00

Okay. I am quite embarrassed to share this.But a few days ago I 've had an attempt of eating boiled eggs. It was about 3-4 a.m. and I was awake doing some work. I put the eggs to boil and went back to my room to finish my work.I totally forgot about the eggs and left it for almost 45-60 minutes. I only remembered when I smelled something irritating. The smell was weak at first and didn't grab my attention. After a couple of minutes, I realized that is a familiar smell, and it's very similar to the one when there is something.... melting!

I ran to the kitchen to find the smell very intense and the whole kitchen was very heated. The "Kanaka"went from silver to black. The eggs of course were inedible, and far beyond boiled :).

I opened every air conditioner in the house, along with the kitchen's window. I was afraid mom would wake up and start the drama. I've soaked the "kanaka" in water and hid it in the washing machine (I was really panicking, and wasn't sure if we should throw it away.)After I threw the eggs in the basket, I stood beside it for a while because I was afraid the egg's heat would start a small fire in garbage's plastic bag.

Sure enough, mom wakes up and the drama began..

Mum: Feeh ree7a 3'areeba..deh men feen?Deh ka2ennaha gayya men el matba7'..
Me: (blank face)
Mum: men feen el ree7a deh?
Mum: Enty nesteey 7aga 3ala el nar?
Me: ah..
Mum: Ya sater Ya Rab..neseety eh?
Me: 7'alas ya mama mesh mohem..7'oshy namy.
Mum:neseety eh?(In a far more serious tone)
Me: Beed.
Mum: El kanaka 7assalaha 7aga? El ree7a sa3ba awy!
Me: ah ya3ny shwaya..bass 7'alas ya mama..le7e2ataha..
Mum:(checking for the kanaka): Heya feen..?
Me: eh..eh..fe 3'assalet el teba2.
Mum:(In shock): EH EL MANZAR DAH! 7ARAM 3ALEEKY YA SHEE7'AA..Rakkezzy shwaya ba2a..
Me: Sorry ya mama wallahy..
Mum: Tab ya3ny mesh termeeha walla te3'seleeha
Me:mana ya mama et7'adeet makontsh 3arfa a3mel eh..
Mum: (Sharp look)
Me: Sorry ya mama..
Mum walks away in silence.I go to sleep.

P.S: The next day, my younger sisters took pleasure in pointing at me all day long and saying "el matwoola ahe ahe!".

أم بالين

2008-03-29T16:49:00.000-07:00

You know that proverb that goes, "أبو بالين كداب و أبو تالتة منافق"?
Well, I feel like I have been Omm Baleen Talata Arba3a for a while.Trying to do a lot of things at the same time and whenever I focus on one thing to get it right, el ba2y beyo2a3 menny..
So next week, I decided to give my self a well-deserved break. I would have loved to have it this week, except that I have got a presentation and an exam by Wednesday and Thursday. But that's it! I Need a break, I Deserve a break and I will Take one,Thank you very much! Yaksh Tewla3!

Hopefully, I'll be back re-charged and back on track. On this break, I'll try to get things from the previous post done!

نفسي

2008-03-26T13:18:00.000-07:00

أسافر

أعرف أكتب شعر

أشوف البحر

أشحن الكارت أو أحول فودافون ايزي

أركب مرجيحة

2-day weekend

أجري لمدة ساعة

أطلع الرخصة

أركب فالوكا

أشتري لبس جديد

أقرى كتاب للغزالي

أضحك لحد أما أدمع

أصور صورة حلوة

أشوف الشروق

أعرف أحوش

Pass Level 8 in Tetris

On My Way Home..

2008-03-25T12:58:00.000-07:00

Today, on my way home, i took a micro-bus "metnakar-fe-sooret-taxi"..We were a total of five different people, with nothing in common but our destination. One of the four other people was a friend of my sister.

Randshom Tshag

2008-03-25T12:06:00.000-07:00

The Rules that most of you already know

Post 10 random things about yourself
Choose 5 people to tag and a reason you chose each person
Leave them each a comment directing them to your blog so they know they are it
You can’t tag the person who tagged you (you’ll have to make new friends)
As a courtesy to the person who tagged you, please let them know when you have posted so they can have the sheer delight and extra work load of reading your answers)
(I thought of also randomizing the numbers)

9- You know those people that you ask out of courtesy "How was your day?" or "How are you doin'?" and they Actually Tell You About It? I am one of those :)

5- I used to have a Hate Hate Hate my braces. I HATED the way I looked.On the other hand, I knew that its a temporary situation and my teeth are going to be great! But I cried a couple of times when I had them on: "Ana zeh2eeet ba2aaaaa"..I am supposed to wear my transparent-retainer and I dont! My dentist will Kill Me!

4- My brain is not "metrakkeba" to play games.Wether its cards or video. I lose my temper when I don't win and I hate it when they are apologetic and say "Sorry, You Lose!".I mean I don't want any pity!Grrrrr..The only game I have on my laptop AND my PC is Tetris. 7atta el snake elly 3ala el mobile..3omry ma7abbetaha!

8-A cup of latte from Cilantro or Second Cup makes my day.I stay happy for at least 8 hours ba3daha, unless of course something drastic happened, like for example..I lost a game.

1-I always have a To-Do list, so that I wont forget what is it to do (duuh!).But I always forget to check and update the to do list after its made.So I have to-do lists that have been there on my laptop for ages(men ayyam el kollya maslan),and of course,many of the listed items, were never done.. (e.g.:System's desgin assignment).

7-I have been on a "healthy" diet since last December.I can now wear size small :) and I intend to continue the diet as long as it takes! I've quit junk food, sweets and chocolate!Lately, I've been going to the gym on an almost-daily basis.The downside of this diet is that I have attained an ugly addition on sugarless-peppermint-tridents.

10- I worry about the availability of water for the future generations.

3-On average, I open about 7 tabs on Firefox simultaneously.Google Reader, GMail, A blog, a Google search are almost always open.In particular, I spend a Tremendous amount of time on Reader.

2-Things I find silly:Talk shows, barameg el koora, valentine's day, video-clips, appetizers, celebrities-obsession "bammooot fe a7mad el sa2a", a7mad el sa2a nafso, formal dress codes,Windows Vista and rannat el mobile.

6-I hold proudly the ability to recite by heart:El Nazer(Ma howa esm moqawel el serameec, w mahowa lawn el serameec el mosta7'dam fel benaa2?), Elly Baly Balak(Mesh 3ayez DVD?DVD?Negebloh DVD?), A7la el Aw2at (3ayza ward yabraheem)and lately El-7assah-El sab3a (Kayfa yajro2 haza el fer3aon al sa3'eer al mota7zleq!)

Tagging:

Arly: Zeyadet Ta2keed 3ala el Tag beta3 Dee. :)

Xero: I bet I'll read some angry, yet funny points!

GreyScale: As an attempt to make you blog more often :)

Sara: A very sweet,inspired,enlightened blogger, with many thoughts common with mine!

Sina: I wonder whatchya gonna say about yourself! (Enty feen ya Sina sa7ee7?)

Happy 100th Post!!

2008-03-15T21:08:00.000-07:00

yeaaaaaay!! I have reached the 100th post!

Actually this is not a happy post at all! It is an angry post. I have been postponing writing this
post since a VERY long time now. I was postponing mainly because I was busy, but I was also hoping for things to get better.Hoping to hear good news of any kind or in any form. I am not talking on the personal level. Things have been great for a while el7amdolelah. But I am talking on a "nation wide" level. I will take this 100th post not to celebrate how much of a great blogger I was these previous 99 posts, but I'll take it to scream out loud some of the things that have been getting on my nerves. I mean isnt that what blogs are for? Letting it all out? Sharing your ideas with friends, fellow bloggers and anonymous strangers who somehow seem to care? Anyways,there are one specific event that really got on my nerves.I postponed writing this post hoping for a happy ending for this event, but it seems that happy endings are only in movies.

The Denmark cartoons:What's getting on my nerves are not the cartoons themselves(Oh yes they are). But what is REALLY getting on my nerves is the islamic countries and people's reaction. When it comes to Islam's image in the west, we get very defensive. As if we did something wrong. As if we are ONLY positioned to weakly defend and patheticly ask for an apology. Why are we blaming non-Muslim westeners for portraying our prophet in cartoons and a mocked false image, when there are many of us arab muslims, who don't even know the least about prophet and his biography that well?I mean, there are a lot of Muslims who are also bluntly attacking the prohpet in the first place.And if not attacking, a lot of muslims are ignorant of his journey to spread the word of Allah.Many Muslims would sadly think that Islam was indeed spread by force, others would have no explaination of why did the prophet marry more than once, others would even question the degree of credibility of his Ahadeeth. And that is from Muslims. What do we expect from non-Muslims?

What I want to say is, we can't blame them for how things ended up to.We don't have the right to get angry.We should of course get angry for our prohpet being mocked at, but we should also be realisitic and understand that everything is a cause-and-effect.The cartoons are an effect. A symptom, of how bad things really are.We should blame ourselves for not presenting Islam as we should by embracing our prophet's teachings.I mean almost all muslim countries compose a vast majority of the 3rd world.A lot of muslims (if not most of them) are sadly lazy, ill-educated,self-absorbed,brain-washed with alot of misconceptions (if any concepts at all) about Islam.If muslims are having misconceptions about Islam, isn't that worth more attention than outsiders having misconceptions of the prophet? Do we as muslim hold up a good presentation of Islam? If people pretend to care so much of how Islam is portrayed in the outside world, they should Act upon it.Not just (Re)act surprised, angry and defensive.

Allah yer7amak ya Geddo, he always repeated the verse of El-Motannaby:

أغاية الدين أن تحفوا شواربكم يا أمة ضحكت من جهلها الأمم

On the other hand, we shouldnt be so much consumed of how the "West sees Islam". What we should care about is just being the best Muslims we could.
It doesnt really matter what we do to portray Islam in the best image.Yes, we are required to be our best, but that doesnt mean to get all consumed in being accepted in the west as a well-respected civilization.
We should be more consumed in developing OURselves for the sake of OURselves, not our image.Other wise,we would be just wasting time trying to prove that "Islam is the perfect religion, it's only the people who apply it wrong". Get the people to apply it right, and then we should rest our case!

قبل لما لأصلح صورة الاسلام في الغرب, أصلح الأصل

There is ALOT to be done before trying to reach the west in defense of Islam. There is ALOT to be done before trying to explain ourselves and our beloved prophet.We should present Islam by example, not by defense. Here is what I think many of us should do, and that is only a humble list of mine.
1- Read, read, read: read about the Islamic History and heritage. Whether or not there is a consiperancy of getting the youth ignorant of the Islamic past, we should read more about Islam.

2-Think, think, think: People stopped using their brains. We stopped thinking creatively, and we take everything for granted.People are numb. We are even lazy to change what we take from the west. Even in our songs, movies and sitcoms. Even in THAT we come last. We are even bad at imitating.

3-Stop complaining: This is addressed to me more than to anyone else. I do waste a lot of time in complaining when it could have been wasted in actually changing something. If you don't like something, you either change it

if you can, or shut up و ذلك أضعف الايمان.

4- Add some value: As muslims, I believe we have only 2 purposes in life: The worshipping following purpose, and that includes all the rituals of Islam that we apply with faith(Praying,fasting..). There is also the building,creating partاعمار الأرض.The one most ignored, the one that requires a Muslim to think,imagine and execute. The one that requires every Muslim to be an added value, to do at least minimum positive change in his surrounding circle of people. I think that the successful Muslim is the one that balances between these 2 purposes in life.

أنا زهقت بقى أن احنا مسلمين هايفين و متخلفين ومكتومين و مكسلين يفكروا. زهقت من احنا كل سنة بنبقى أوحش من اللي قبلها. نفسي نتغير

Happy 100th Post!

Tagged: 6 things to be done before getting 18

2008-02-20T20:44:00.000-08:00

Yeaaay! I am tagged again! and again! That's what you get from being a gemini!
Thanks sara & Blue Lue :)

So,حرصا مني على رغبات المدونين الأعزاء , I will treat each tag independently and write down 12 different things I think one should do before getting 18!

Okay..here it goes:

1- Read Harry potter, To Kill a Mocking Bird,Flash w Smash, ElRagolo El Mosta7eel ,Sar7'et el ro3b.. pick a comic that you would love forever.
Books read in teenage years are carved in the memory. They do help one getting "outside" ideas about the world other than those your parents try to put in your head.

2- Be as stupid (as frequent) as possible.As long as you are under 18, you are more likely to be excused for your stupidity. Being a teenager isn't easy.You are almost always angry, emotional and confused. It is okay to jokingly throw a friend in the pool. It is okay to cut your sister's hair while she is sleeping. It is okay to try out mixing ice-cream with fries. It is okay to make fun of your principle and get caught. As long as you are under 18, people would understand. After that, you have no excuse.So be as stupid as much as you can, or you're lose most of your teenage-fun!

3- Decide on your dream job, and your alternative not-so-dreamy job if the first one didn't work out. It should go something like: When I grow up, i'll be an artist like Picasso! People will start telling you انها شغلانه مش بتأكل عيش و ان بيكاسو نفسه مات من الجوع. Your alternative dream job is: Farran.بما ان الفران على طول بيعمل عيش فأكيد هياكل منه

4- Pick a hobby.Smoking is not a hobby. Chatting is not a hobby. Checking you email is not a hobby, downloading movies is not a hobby.Pick a hobby..I regret not having a consistent one since then.

5- You must be able to swim, ride a bicycle, and at least tried driving: My sister is 14 and somehow محدش خاد باله انها مش بتعرف تسوق عجلة..deep down, she feels less than everybody who can drive bicycles. You should make sure that you are able to swim too. If you have a phobia,get rid of it.

6- Read the whole Quraan at least once. Know your main obligations towards Allah. I think this should be done even before reaching 15 or something. But by 18 one should have all his main questions and concerns about Islam and belief answered.
------------------------
1- Have a perfect escape plan, then ditch it. All teenagers below 18 think of running away. Most of them think of committing suicide. I thought of running away a couple hundred times and my life was just fine. Somehow, being under 18 you feel trapped, and you think running away would solve all your problems, or at least change your problems. If you are going to think of running away then think of a master plan then don't ever try it. You should have it as to laugh about it in your 20s and regret not executing it in your 30s, hope your kids would never know about it in your 40s.

2-Get over your childhood crush. Childhood crushes are cute and funny, but enough is enough!

3-Make a diary(or a blog :)). Somehow writing makes life easier. It helps one rationalize and even wonder and reflect about their own life. A diary also helps one have a feeling that their life is important and eventful it should be written down. It's good for your self-esteem and your sanity mela7'er (unless you started talking to your diary)

4- Pick your favorite movie as a benchmark. 3ala aymna kan Braveheart. No matter how popular or nerd a you were in high school, we all agreed that Braveheart was the best of all time (FREEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM). Growing up, you will use that movie to see if any other movie measures up, and at a certain point it would be safe and the movie old enough to pick a new favorite movie (currently: The Pursuit of Happyness)

5-Get into a fight. Yes. you have to know how to be confrontational. Even if it means a scar in the forehead that would last forever; you will then learn that you should never be confrontational ever again! For girls: لازم تتخانئي مع واحدة و تشدي شعرها عشان قالت عليكي تخينه

6-El Tazwee3': This is an integral part of being under 18. So whether or not I approve of it now (بعد لما كبرت و عقلت), it was so much fun.The only catch is not that you might get caught by your parents, but that this habit will stay with you until you are a respectable person who goes to work and still wants to sneak out. So, zawa3'o 3ala add mate2daroh!

Almost every blogger I know is already tagged, so if you are not tagged yet, you are!

صباحو فتي

2008-02-12T15:49:00.000-08:00

من كام يوم, كنت راجعة من الشغل في التاكسي و طبعا الدنيا كانت زحمة جدا كالعادة .المهم واحد في الشارع تجاهل تماما اني راكبة التاكسي و شاورله و ركب. مفيش دقيقة والراكب الجديد "اكتشف" ان الدنيا زحمة و ان احنا تقريبا لسه واقفين في نفس المكان اللي ركب منه و راح قال للسواق:"الدنيا لو فضلت زحمة كدة, أنا هانزل و اكمل مشي". فضل يطأطأ و يتأفف كأنه مش من مصر. و راح قال تاني "احنا امفروض نعمل زي في أمريكا". السواق قاله "أفندم؟". الراجل تاني قال "لازم نعمل زي أمريكا معملت".

السواق راح موطي صوت الكاسيت عشان حس ان الراجل هيقول حاجة مهمة. استطرد الرجل قائلا:"عملوا ايه في أمريكا؟ هما كان عندهم ولاية زحمة زي عندنا كده بالظبط, الولاية دي تبقى ولاية نيويورك(خدت بالك من ولاية دي؟).راحوا حطوا فوق كل شارع كوبري.. يعني يبقى الشارع ماشي كده والكوبري ماشي فوقيه بالظبط. عشان كدة سموا الولاية ولاية نيو -يورك..نيو يعني جديدة و يورك زي ايه زي مصر الجديدة كدة.عشان بقى عندهم مدينة جديدة بس من فوق.مش احنا عاملين كوبري أكتوبر و فرحانين بيه!! لااا هما خلاص حلوا مشكلة الزحمة دي من زمان.. لازم نعمل زيهم يبقى فوق كل شارع كوبري, ده كده يدوبك يكفي الناس دى كلها."
طبعا أنا كنت ماسكة نفسي من الضحك بالعافية!بس غالبا كنت فاتحة بقي من الازبهلال.
لكن السواق الفطن سأله طب يعني لما الناس تطلع الكوبري, لما ييجوا ينزلوا بقى, ما هيبقى في مشكلة في المصب برده". رد عليه الراجل بشجاعة"و أنا ايش عرفني, أنا مش مهندس" يعني كفاية قوي انه فكرلنا في الحل اللي عايز ينفذ بقى يبقى مع نفسه.
عامة هو الراجل عندو حق في ان احنا لازم نعمل كباري أكتر من كده...بس أنا صدمت من درجة الجرأة في الفتي..

والله أعلم

Time-Out

2008-02-09T09:26:00.000-08:00

I'll take a break from the following:
- Gtalk and MSN
- Facebook
- TV

The reason? They are all getting on my nerves, one way or another, not to mention the tremendous amount of time wasted on them. The duration? As long as it takes.
I was thinking of switching my mobile off too. But instead, i'll just be selective on the calls i answer.
I was also thinking of pausing on finishing the 100 years of solitude book.It is getting grumpy,solitary, old and painful.I have enough pain in real life on that matter.But instead, i'll finish it as soon as possible to get it out of my system, and get it over with.

Good Morning

2008-02-05T22:25:00.000-08:00

Dad wakes up on a phone call,finishes it and tells me to hand him the news paper (which I was reading). Then..

Dad:Hateely el naddara w e3meleely el shaay.
Me: 7adher
So I go fetch him "el naddara" first .

Dad: Eh dah! ommal feen el shay?!mesh oltelek e3meleely shay?
Me: Baba, being a gemini doesnt imply that I can be at 2 places in the same time.
Dad: :D. Tab matnseesh te7oteely ma3aah el bo2somat.

Me: el shay ya baba..
Dad (reading): Tab 7oteeh 3ala el sofrah.

5 mins later:Dad still reading the newspaper.

Me: baba, el shay talleg.
Dad: alla! mesh tendaheeny?
Me:I did.
Dad: Tab mesh tetamenny enny omt?
Me: :)
Dad( reading me a part of the newspaper): التواضع شيء عظيم, لكن ليس لدرجة الاعتراف بأن هناك من هو أعظم مني

Me: dah anees mansour?
Dad: Bayen keda.

Dad: Rambo nezel! The same old crap..over and over again..mafeesh 7aga gedeeda nezlet..kolloh nafs el araf..
Dad: yaah..da7na hanle3ab bokra Cote De'voir essa3a 10: 30...Ya Rabb ne7'sar!! (My dad hates soccer and specially the chaotic commotion in the streets after the "stupid victories" as he calls them).

P.S.: We have this conversation almost every morning, with the difference of the things he reads me from the newspaper.

Beautiful.

2008-02-02T13:40:00.001-08:00

A Grandfather & Granddaughter

I took this picture today in the club.Can you see the loving smile on the old man's face? He stayed like this for almost half an hour, and even when he was up to stroll around, he couldn't take his eyes off her.

Anonymous

2008-02-02T12:27:00.000-08:00

The following is a selection of quotes I heard from not so famous people.

"A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does. A woman marries a man expecting that she will change him, but she can't."

"If I could take back time, I would work on networking and building relationships with people. It's who you know not what you know."

"If there is anything you do in this life in which you don't take Al-A7'ra into consideration, then it is plain garbage ."

"It is only when you try to change something you get yourself enemies. If you choose to be neutral, a follower, then the only enemy you got is yourself, which is more dangerous."

"What's more difficult than being poor, is feeling poor."

"It's not a bad thing to work hard, but working hard in doing something you like is the right thing."

"Any studying material can be done in exactly 24 hours."

"Egyptians don't follow the weather news. That's why you always find them wearing clothes that don't consistently match the weather."

"What do you call a person who speaks only one language? An American" (That might be a famous quote)

"The worst thing in marriage is the disillusionment. Damn Cinderella."

"It's only crowded from 8 to 8."

"TV is one of the worst inventions. Or maybe its just left in the wrong hands."

"Its amazing how stupid people can be.They can be so stupid you think they are doing it intentionally"

"Egyptians don't solve their problems. They work around them.They have this unimaginable capacity to adapt to any given circumstances. They never stop complaining though."

"Being overweight adds at minimum 5 years to your age."

"The most important part of your life is how you end it. Just like in the movies."

"Everybody has his or her own test in life. And this fact is far more fair than what it may seem. "

"I think somehow, a person's name is inflicted on their personality,even if their name means absolutely nothing."

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again,expecting a different result."

"Its a funny and a mysterious process how things get their names."

"If someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, you don't have to lie. Just don't answer it, even if they repeat their question."

"As strange as it sounds: having fun is hard work."

No Title Found

2008-01-29T08:24:00.002-08:00

My Grandpa passed away last Saturday. He died after 2 painful months of discovering that he has, i mean had, a late diagnosed cancer.
His last days were extremely painful and we all prayed a lot that God would bestow mercy on him. I have deep faith that his death was mercy for him and that he is in a better place now isA.

Like any other death incident, it makes one put things into its own perspective. It makes one see before hand his own end. It makes one focus on what is important but was long neglected. It makes one re-prioritize.

I have to say that because of my grandpa's health conditions,doctors had told us that there was no cure for his condition and that all science could do for him was a couple of sedatives and pain killers.They told us to pray and stay in remembrance of God and his mercy. So we kinda saw it coming and we were psychologically prepared to hear the bad news.

Being prepared, when i actually got the news I felt strangely calm and maybe even grateful. He was living in torture and there seemed no other way out of it. My dominating emotion was that I felt really scared for my mother's health and endurance since she was in the core of this emotional trauma and she has just lost her father. I was in state of denial.Whenever someone tells me "البقاء لله", I couldn't believe that they were talking about my grandpa. My brain made all its tricks to stay out of shock, to stay in disbelief. I felt sad but at the same time I felt that it's OK. I didn't go to work next day of course but since I felt "OK", I went to work the day after it, yesterday.
Suddenly on my way to work, it hit me. Suddenly I felt a tremendous rock on my chest. I couldn't breath. Suddenly I "understood" that my grandpa passed away and that I wont ever gonna see him again. I will not hear him laugh, I will not see him praying or reading the quraan. I will not talk to him,learn from him. I will not listen to his wise words, his childhood memories, him telling my mother to leave me alone whenever she tries to discipline me.
It felt terrible. It still does. I felt like a huge void inside me. An emptiness deep in my soul that hurts only when I breathe. Something tremendous is missing. Something out of order. I burst into tears and wished that I could see him just one more time.

I was his first grandchild and he sure made me feel special. He was the only one to call me "oojy 7abebty" in an irreplaceable warm voice. He entitled me "ya doctora" just before my graduation so that to instill in me to continue my post graduate studies.

I don't think that I'll ever get over missing him. A friend of mine told me that those memories instead of bringing tears to your eyes, they would make you smile. I can't see how yet.

The worst part of the day is waking up. You know when you have a bad dream of someone dying or was about to die and wakeup gratefully that it was only a dream? Waking up feels the exact opposite. I wake up to realize that grandpa is in fact gone and that I miss him terribly.

Ouch.Writing this post is even harder than i thought. But it was also hard not writing it at all.

To whoever reads this: please pray for my grandpa, and if you know me in person kindly tolerate my rather inconsistent attitude. When people talk to me in condolence I feel like I want to be left alone. When people do leave me alone, I feel like I want a shoulder to cry on and that I am lonely, cold and scared.

Rabbena yer7amak ya Geddo :(

The Pledge

2008-01-22T08:58:00.000-08:00

Enough is freakin' enough. I will have my driver's license by June,before my 22nd birthday. I don't care that I don't have a car. I don't care how stupid people drive. I don't care how much time it would take me to learn, how many accidents I make on my dad's car. It's too late already. I will learn how to drive or die trying. But I will never feel helpless, clueless or under anyone's mercy again. I will not beg taxi drivers to get me home in the rain. I will not walk in the streets fearing strangers, or thieves. I will learn how to drive and that's final.
Enough is freakin' enough.

2 Kinds

2008-01-19T23:53:00.000-08:00

There are 2 kinds of people:
Those who make a sippin'-sound while drinking coffee
and
Those who hate people who make a sippin'-sound while drinking coffee.

In the most difficult times

2008-01-19T04:49:00.001-08:00

One should never forget the blessings which God bestowed on him. I am a great believer of "ان مع العسر يسر"
In the most difficult times, one should never lose faith that things are to get better.
In the most difficult times, one should never forget that he had good days as well.Good days that he might have taken for granted.

As a matter of fact,lately, my days weren't a clear cut of "good days" and "bad days". They were more like "gray days".
A lesson growing up:Almost every one has equal amount of reasons to be completely devastated and depressed and to be fully content and satisfied.It's your choice.

Garfield For President

2008-01-18T01:55:00.000-08:00

Last May during my finals,I discovered comics.com; which made me almost fail my project management subject(how ironic). I spent more than 80% of my internet time on it. Not everyone likes comics and not everyone gets its sense of humor.At first, I didn't really get it either. But after a short while, I got the hang of it and literally adored it. For sometime, I started to talk like them.I even thought of creating my own comical series based on true characters I've met (a.k.a friends). I would be the main character with no doubt of it. I'll be the funniest, prettiest,most intelligent and an internet addict. This is not a wild exaggeration of the truth.I have a drafted mycomic.txt file on my PC where I sketched the main characters. But nothing more.

The reason why people don't get comics is that they expect to laugh at them. Cherry is always like "ana mesh 3arfa enty eh elly 3agbek fel comics deh, mafeehash ayy 7aga teda7ak".

Well, she is right. Comics are not jokes. They are just...comics. They are just light humor; its like a part of a good conversation, where someone is too smart, too stupid, too tired, too short, too late, too lazy,too fat..and so on.Somehow you would relate to a certain comics character, or you know someone who for example is as a workaholic as Dilbert.

My dear friend, Dee, is also a fan of comics. But she is specifically a fan of Garfield. She checks Garfield on daily basis. She is convinced that her horoscope is Garfield ( meaning that somehow, the Garfield daily strip, captures her today mood,or a current situation).
I am specifically a fan of Dilbert. I check Dilbert.com on daily basis. Dilbert is my horoscope only its a week late. (meaning, that somehow, the Dilbert daily strip captures my week-old mood or a week-old situation).

Now if Dee and I are talking about comics, there are only 2 persons in the world who can understand what on earth are we talking about; and these are :Dee and I.(e.g. The title of the post.)

Here is my ranked list of my fave comics.It is variable to change, but Dilbert is left untouched!

1- Dilbert

2-Moderately Confused

3-Garfield

4-Betty

5-Andy Capp

6-That's Life

If I was 5 years younger, I know I would have been a fan of snoopy. But I grew out of it without even passing through a snoopy-stage.It doesn't matter now. I have Dilbert :)

P.S: just vote for Garfield.

Down or Up?

2008-01-12T10:00:00.001-08:00

I have been very mixed up lately. Relieved, Scared, Tired, Relaxed, Worried, Happy, Angry, Up and Down.. Its because of all the things happening at once!
And every time I am in a certain "frame of mind" or mood, I decide to blog about it and let it out. By the time I am almost done with the post, something happens and my mood is changed again. I have about 7 drafts and 1 deleted post in 3 days!

Last Sunday for example: I was studying for 12 hours straight,its 7 20 in the morning I just had a 1 hour quick nap and I still have alot to finish before my exam at 11 30. Suddenly, an earthquake hits. I was terribly confused. I was frightened of course, but 10 minutes after the quake was gone I felt that I was too busy to panic and started to study again. It usually takes me 10 days to fully recover from an earthquake.

Take for example today: I never saw my grandpa this sick in my whole entire life. I never saw him this fragile, weak cure-less and helpless. On another note, my cousin gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and named her Danya. How am I supposed to feel?I am confused. Crying seems tempting to me. But again I am too angry to cry( work related stuff).

In general, these days are extremely hard for me and my family. And you know how in hard times people show what they are really made of? I am discovering too many new traits in me and in my family members, I can't keep track.

I don't know how should I face hardships like grownups. I don't know how. I don't know what to think or what to say when things are awkward. I just freeze. I guess I am in the learning phase and I am trying to learn as much as possible from the given situation. But still I feel like wanting to be a little kid when no one is expecting anything from me. Is this cowardliness? I don't know I am still learning.

I can only ask God for help.

والناس في عز البرد يجروا و يستخبوا

2008-01-04T14:34:00.000-08:00

وأنا متنيلا على عيني قعدة باذاكر درس بدرسه

It's terribly cold and all I want is, some free time without guilt, a good movie and my beloved بطانية

نوم الظالم

2008-01-02T16:01:00.000-08:00

Who ever came up with such an expression? I find it strangely funny. I mean, imagine a person is so evil that it is considered worshiping just to be harmlessly sleeping.For a couple of days, I was completely sleep deprived. I had caffeine all of the time. It didnt help me focus and it didnt let me sleep. It's all because i am having the "pre-masters exams week". So naturally, i was procrastinating, panicking, and studying. But i didnt sleep.I couldn't.
I felt sleepy only in the midst of my exam today, perfect timing. I actually thought of "sleeping just 5 mins". I put the pen down, with my eyes half closed and couldnt think of anything except a warm bed.The only thing that stopped me from actually falling asleep is a story i heard from someone I dont remember about someone I dont know who stayed awake before the exam for so long, he was so tired by the time he was in the exam and actually fell asleep w راح عليه الامتحان .So I came back to reality, and had a couple of tridents in my mouth and completed the stupid exam.
Which reminds me how much I hated my exam today! It was something of this sort:

Question One: Discuss chapter 1.

Question Two: Discuss and illustrate chapter 2.

Question Three: Compare and Contrast
a- chapter 4 and 17.
b- chapter 7 and 8.
c- parts 5.1 and 5.6

Question four: Discuss and illustrate chapter 6. Explain.

Question five: بم تفسر
a- Chapter 9 is before chapter 10.
b- It is cold outside.
c-the impacts of chapter 5 on the weight of the book.

Question six: From your project work, try to talk about chapter 14 and your project at the same time. Be creative. What do you suggest people do after you read the chapter?

Bonus Question: Discuss and illustrate chapter 11 بالمرة

You have only 3 hours to pull this off, Good Luck!

When the time was almost up, someone asked whether he could get an extra answers-sheet. He was at the last bench and everyone turned around to see who was it. He didnt get one of course and the supervisor told him "ماينفعش, بس انت اتقر عليك خلاص"

Needless to say that I went home directly to my long-missed bed. I thought I would only wake up the next day, but I was surprisingly awake after 6 hours of sleep. I woke up on a terrible headache, a mobile ringing and an empty stomach!I discovered that I have been living on tridents for 24 hours. My mum jokingly asked me" صحيتي ليه يا أوجي, ده نوم الظالم عبادة".
I replied lazily: "جعانة".

Well, the week is just starting and I have till next tuesday in this ,well,torment ..Rabbena yostor!

How to master procrastination?

2007-12-25T20:17:00.000-08:00

Procrastination can affect every part of your life. It adds spice and challenge.It turns everything into an ordeal..

It is also a great way to piss people around you off. It puzzles them, specifically when you end up doing fine. It is a trait that beholders should proudly..(i'll complete next time)

I have to confess. I AM a procrastinator. A proffessional one. I get things done. but only when its last minute before its too late. I get on my nerves many many times.I tried to stop myself from this self-destructive behaviour. But I always procrastinate in that too..

I think it is time to share my talents..maybe you share some of these..or maybe you would learn from others..
1- Have a to do list: Okay, procrastination doesnt mean that you dont know what you have to do..that is a great misconception. If you dont know what you have to do..how will you manage when to procastinate what? you always have to know whachya gotta do..Just dont do it (yet).

2- Don't carry a watch: Not just that, but always ask abruptly about the time. What time is it now? OMG am running late..Carrying a watch would automatically deprive you from the right that you dont know exactly how much time you have got left, which typically means..there is much time left.

3- Dramatize: This is fun. complaining about the amount of work you have to do, and how little time you have left is always a great game to play. People sympathize everytime. People start to help. Not only that, it gives you even more time to waste.Keywords to use: Crisis, Ma2saah, enyahar, ed3eely, mesh hal7a2, tremendous, too much, too little, and the like :)

4- Remember the things you WANT to do: when there are things that you NEED to do..This is a typical me: Sitting online wanting to finish a certain research...hmm let's check facebook first, then google reader, then some blogs ofcourse, emailing an old friend, browsing flicr,then suddenly am reading through wikipedia, not to finish down my researchm but to look up some scientific concept like the six degrees of seperation, or maybe reading through a script of a movie i used to like, then searching for this part on youtube, then googling the cast..then what did i want to do? aaah the research..okay..what was it about..hmmm data warehousing..that needs some brains..I need to get myself a cup of coffee first..I can go on forever..bottom line: I do the research next day.

5- Organize: This is a great time waster. You have to finish some bills..You open your drawers then you realize that they need some tidying up.You can't work like this..You have to clean up that mess.After probably one hour of tidying up the drawers, color coding and categorizing every paper (procrastinators are also perfectionists), you get really excited and start with your wardrobe.

6- Now is the time: this is the toughest thing in procrastination: Deciding the exact time when to stop it. when exactly do you start studying for the exam? the previous day? the previous afternoon? or the previous night? When do you actually go prepare the presentation you have to do? On the weekend? or in the car on your way to work? I can't answer this question..But the moment you think it is physically impossible to finish what you have got to do in the amount of time given, then start doing it ;).

7- What's the worst that could happen?: you have something you gotta do and you really dont feel like it.so what? If your life is not at stake, then it is not really important now.

8- Getting it done: okay, you have wasted all the amount of time there is that you can waste. You have 10 minutes left to do the work that should typically take an hour. The keyword here is "focus". Remember that you procrastinate for one thing..the challenge..so you have to keep reminding yourself that "i can do this" in the last minute(s). I mean how many bombs in movies were deactivated in literally the last seconds just because the so called hero was procrastinating all the time..I mean if he can do it..so can you...

9-Congrats: you did it! you finished what you had to do..whether it was sloppy or not, you did it :).You have to congrat your self and treat yourself a nice movie/meal/outing

10- The little things: I almost forgot to tell you how much it is important to waste your time doing the little things first..a phone call, grabbing something to eat, checking your mail, reading the newspaper, deciding what to do first,replanning, picking a new look, writing a list of a movie you would like to watch, actually downloading the movie..they work like magic..

P.S: This was written the night before my certifiaction exam(3 weeks ago), and was kept as a draft because i kept procrastinating proof-reading it.

Tackling Soccer.

2007-12-23T09:21:00.000-08:00

Deep Breath. I have really mixed feelings towards soccer. I like the game, but I think it's overrated. I consider myself to be ahlawya and at the same time I have minimal information about the players. But what dazzles me the most is how phenomenal it is. People get really fanatic about soccer. That's the part I don't get. It is a game after all. Games are supposed to be fun, and if your team is losing, you shouldn't really get THAT upset. Of course you might accuse me of being an ahlawaya and we haven't lost that much recently. But again the fact still holds itself. It's a damn game.

Here are some points I just want to spill out concerning soccer, they are unrelated and have almost nothing in common except that they are all about, well, soccer! Here it goes:

1- My father hates it when there is an Ahly Vs. 3afreet azra2 is playing. We live on a street where it turns into a celebration playground every time ElAhly wins (which of course is frequent). You have to hear him say " Ya Rab el Ahly ye7'sar" every time. When I ask him "mesh ento konto bet3meloh keda zaman?" He says "Aywa, and it was stupid..people should grow out of it".

2- Whenever I get the slightest chance of watching games in other leagues: English, Italian or whatever, I feel how pathetic we play. Watching Egyptian soccer players and comparing them to those guys gives you much more than hint why are we still "ma7allak serr".
They play with passion for goodness sake, they are professional and they are always after the ball until the last possible chance. They don't give up any ball. If it bounces back, they try again and again. They have no problem "yer2assoh el koora" on the verge of the playground. Minimal lost chances. They really put their best. They know what "team spirit" is all about. Maybe they hate each other we never know. They are professional enough to play "together".

When you watch an Egyptian match, you feel that the players are running "bel3afya".Ma7adesh taye2 nafsoh. Shadd w za2 w fouls lel sob7. Players are generally fighting not playing. Every one wants to run with the ball as long as possible wala ka2enno captain maged. And when anything goes wrong, there is always the coach to blame.

3- Why the exaggeration? whether a team lost or won. There is always an exaggeration in the display of emotions. I truly believe that people are very desperate that they just want to enjoy even the slightest victories. Even if it's a trivial football match. They want to feel any kind of triumph, achievement and power. Bass deh teb2a moseeba! I mean if the whole country(with all its classes, backgrounds and differences)has nothing to celebrate except a football match, something is definitely wrong. No, everything is wrong. Isn't there anything more important or precious in these people's lives that they can celebrate or grief together? Nothing to unite the people except "mont7'abna el watany"? Okay, it's a nice notion that sports in general unite people and all that, But still. It shouldnt be the ONE & ONLY thing that get people EXTREMELY happy or EXTREMELY sad.

4- There is something I don't get at all. Maybe its a "guy thing" but I just can't get it. The TV shows talking about a soccer game or player or whatever. They talk about the most trivial things in the the most serious tones and attitudes. Why do people care whether this guy or another didn't like the defense tactics of the team? I watched the match. I can tell for myself. Who cares what does he expect to happen in the 2nd half? Why is it important? Why there is a huge base of audience of these shows I really can't understand! Allak el koora ma3 dream.

5- w a7ebb fel a7'er a2ool alf alf alf mabrook le Kaka w Messi w Ronaldo 3ala el laqab el sanady, w dayman keda ya Rab raf3een rass el 3alam el talet. 3o2bal keda 7add men 3andena.. 7'ally el nass tefra7!

راح العيد أهو راح العيد

2007-12-22T20:16:00.000-08:00

Call me a kid, but Eid for me is a "festive" event. I have to go buy something new(inshallah 7atta gazma), I have to go to a new place or a long-not-visited place,I have to be in a good mood and hang out with people that i like. Mel a7'er, I have to celebrate and have fun.

This Eid was very strange. It wasn't strange, it was depressing. The happiest day was yoom el wa2fa and then everything was awkward. It was very routine like,I was very much disappointed in many major and minor occasions. I was disillusioned ( a topic needing a post on its own) , and it was what you can call "pathetic".

And even the brief moments in which I was happy and content,SOMETHING/ONE has to come up and just spoil it for me! A lousy waiter, unwanted guests, too many fake smiles, phony conversations, de-motivation, a canceled outing,the weirdest feeling of wanting to die ,a fight,a sugarless cup of mint, waking up at 6 am with a headache, mayya ma2too3a w 3andena el unwanted guests, a teenage sister..etc.

I just felt like I was trying too hard to be happy with minimal success. I did have happy moments. I mean I did buy something new and went to a long-not-visited-place (I wasnt going out that much before anyway) , but then Dammit!

Then there is the guilty feeling which makes everything worse. I felt guilty for not being grateful for even the brief moments I felt happiness or joy. Which is simply put: I feel down for not being happy and I feel guilty for being down for not being happy. Perfect mood fel Eid essara7a!

At the back of my mind, anytime I feel down, depressed or simply not in the mood, the inner voice suddenly is heard " ya sheee7'a e7mdy Rabbena, feeh 3'erek mesh la2y yaakol aslan".
This inner voice (I'll call him Sayed), just comes ANY TIME I feel blue. mabalko ba2a fel 3eed.
Whenever I feel that there is no real justification for being blue and that I am just exaggerating, I feel even more upset and angry at myself.I just Hate Sayed! Can you feel the negative vibe of this post?

So overall, I pretended to be happy most of the time. Now I am about 1 week away from my premasters finals and I didnt feel like I got the break that I wanted. No, the break that I "needed". I feel the utmost feeling of carelessness.

P.S: I just discovered that " el mogamlat el egtma3ya" is one of the most tiresome exercises ever( At least they are for me, as far as I am concerned). I can't take them and I can't pretend that to be smiling for more than 2 seconds.Which is rude. But then, what the heck.

Happy Thought: The best thing about this Eid is that its over!I dont have to pretend that I am happy anymore!

Enlightening ُ

2007-12-15T16:07:00.000-08:00

عند الإمام أحمد عن صهيب رضي الله عنه قال : بينا رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قاعد مع أصحابه إذ ضحك ، فقال : ألا تسألوني مم أضحك ؟ قالوا : يا رسول الله ومم تضحك ؟ قال : عجبت لأمر المؤمن إن أمره كله خير ؛ إن أصابه ما يحب حمد الله ، وكان له خير ، وإن أصابه ما يكره فَصَبَر كان له خير ، وليس كل أحد أمره كله له خير إلا المؤمن

رواه مسلم

: قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم

"من بات وهو آمن في سربه، معافىً في بدنه، عنده قوت يومه وليلته، فكأنما حيزت له الدنيا بحذافيرها"

رواه الترمذي

عن أبي العباس عبد الله بن عباس رضي الله عنهما قال:"كنت خلف النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم يوماً، فقال لي:
" يا غلام إني أعلمك كلمات: احفظ الله يحفظ، احفظ الله تجده تجاهك، إذا سألت فأسأل الله، وإذا استعنت فاستعن بالله؛ واعلم أن الأمة لو اجتمعت على أن ينفعوك بشيء، لم ينفعوك إلا بشيء قد كتبه الله لك، وإن اجتمعوا على أن يضروك بشيء، لم يضروك بشيء قد كتبه الله عليك، رفعت الأقلام وجفت الصحف".

رواه الترمذي

Stating The Obvious

2007-12-11T09:25:00.000-08:00

Personality Tests. I have taken tens of those..how much you are in control of your life? What Kind of fruit are you?Are you sociable or introverted? Are you the comforting type? How well do you: save/organize/manage time? Are you left handed or right handed?
Do you like mornings better or late nights? Do you talk to much on the phone? Do you hate yourself? Are you sleeping enough?How do you like your eggs? Would you like fries with that Sir? Are you having a cold?

I have taken a lot of those tests, specially when I was a teenager and we thought it was cool to answer an MCQ and would be told what we are really made of.

The thing with personality tests is that they simply tell you about yourself what you already know.I mean what a surprise I turned to be a right-handed type of person after all! who would have guessed! I know how bad I am in managing my time, I know that I always work late at night, I know that I am sociable and definitly not the comforting type, am not having cold and I couldn't really see what does it mean by being an apple/strawberry/Kiwi type of person.

Personalty Tests Just State The Obvious.

Personality tests are very popular and are very overrated. I think people take them as to get a certain re-assurance or acknowledgment of who they are. They already know, but they like to be told. you spend about 5 minutes choosing what best fits you and then you get something like "You are the Hard worker", "In another life you were a butterfly, you are a free spirit", "If you were a Disney character you would probably be Belle from Beauty and the Beast (for female) and Eric from the little mermaid (for male)"..

As long as they are not upsetting you, personality tests are great..But there are many types of Personality Tests:

1- The analogy: Symbolizing your character with that of a cartoon, fruit, animal, TV show, movie, a season, a sitcom character ( I tied Chandler and Ross once),a comic character (Ranging from Garfield to DareDevil), you name it!
These are really just for the fun of it and should never be taken seriously.

In your free time do you:
a- Sit back watch TV and eat like Garfield
b- are always looking for love like Rachel/Ross in friends
c- read a lot of books in case you showed in Jeopardy or Who Wants To Be a Millionaire
d- have to be surrounded by a group like Dolphins

If you answered:
a, then if you were a comic character you would have been Garfield
b,then if you were a sitcom you would have been Rachel/Ross
c, then if you were a TV show you would have been Jeopardy
d, then if you were an animal, you would have been a dolphin

2- The Personality Trait: You answer a set of questions and then voila! You know exactly where on the spectrum do you belong. Are your actually spending too much or too little? How much time are you having for yourself? Just one personality trait that is questioned.The answers are usually collected in points and then you see to which category you belong to.The funny thing about this one is the way they put the answer. You know that If you answer a lot of Ds you are going to be a real spender, so you cheat! If you didn't cheat and had a lot of Ds then you know the answer before hand (the point of this post) and dont need to complete this survey anyways.

So answer me this: You are in a mall, Do you:
a- Just go window shopping, you do have the necessities
b- If you really like something, you will get it.
c- No harm in pampering oneself
d- Have taken a pledge of spending every penny before you set foot outside the mall
(ان شالله ما عن حد حوش )

well.. I think كل واحد عارف نفسه

3- The Personality Type: Now that is different than the one mentioned earlier.You get an answer as a whole portfolio of your character.Your deepest personality qualities and traits are exposed. You can turn out to be a real miser, into fashion, lonely or funny and didn't even know it (yeah right).
These are typically like the Zodiac signs description of the personality..
The funny part is. If people are divided into exactly a number X of personality types, wouldn't life have been much easier? You know a co-worker is Taurus, so you try to avoid arguing with him because it would just make things worse.
You know the person you love is a Libra, so you get them flowers because they are really romantic.
مكانش حد غلب

You are?
a- Tall
b- Short
c- Medium-height

If you answered a/b/c you are as follows (this is just to prove that i can write something that can almost fit everybody):

You are the Kind Person Type. You are funny, smart, sociable, you love to hang out with friends, you are hard worker when you are needed. You are a loyal friend. you get hurt if cheated/stabbed from the back and may not forget easily. People turn to you for advise in a lot of things because you are a great listener. Small things can get on your nerves. You hate traffic jams. You are courageous and you are not afraid to tell the truth if you are asked for it. Sometimes you like to be the center of attention and sometimes you like to be left alone.
You are very romantic but a lot of times work to hide it. You forget things easily, but not dates like bdays, anniversaries and national holidays.You are stubborn but caring. You are Loud but can be quiet and observing carefully. You are modest but full of pride..

Well what can I say..aren't we all !

I Need An Invention..

2007-12-08T13:25:00.000-08:00

Need is supposed to be the mother of invention. I think that this is one of the most insightful phrases I have ever heard.The problem is, I have this urge (ba2aly fatra) of wanting to invent something new..I want to DO something NEW! I want to invent something, preferably computer/technology related.. Or maybe something that would change the lives of people that is simple and intuitive. I want to be an inventor:The lab, the explosives, the experiments, the excitement and everything that goes with it (even the crazy attitude)!
عايزة أخترع حاجة..

It all started when i began reading all these tech-related news in my Google Reader. I had feeds about Google, Microsoft, IBM,Oracle, AT&T, and all the gigantic organizations..they are all consumed with introducing something new almost on weekly basis.. then suddenly it hit me: I felt really distant from these companies. I envied them..why do they get to do all the interesting stuff and i am stuck here? Why can't we do something as big or as interesting or as useful? Why can't I think of something new and innovative?
This urge was triggered again this week..when attending this course where i had to learn about a certain software.The instructor kept saying things like " homma 3amleen kaza..el system bey2ddem kaza..w medeena el option dah.. w mesh masmoo7 a3mel keda.." meen homma dool? I mean who sets these rules? I want to have my own invention with its sets of rules too. why do i have just to "use" what others have made? Why can't I "make" something that others can use?

I know that "inventing" needs commitment, time, effort, management, dedication and a lot of money..but as they say, "if there is a will there is a way". Ironically, it has been translated to "ليس كل ما يتمناه المرء يدركه". I'll go with the English version.

Here is my naive plan:

Work for 7-10 years
Save salaries and think of an idea while am at it
Quit work.
Start implementing my idea with my funds. (for 7 years)
Get bankrupt (in 2 years time)
Ask family or friends for help
Get drowned in debt ( for another 2 years)
Glimpse of light
Get Lucky
People start adapting the idea(from 6-10 months)
Boom: My dream comes true..
I have a used invention :)
I pay family and friends their money back
Multimillionaire..(just enough for the couple of years I have left to spend it all)
Rest In Peace

Sounds Perfect!

I Need to invent something.. I don't want to invent to get rich or famous (that would be nice of course) but I "need" to invent as in an instinctive necessity. I believe that a person's value is determined by how much change he introduces into the world. We merely exist on earth to make it a better place to live in and to have a "contribution" or what the Islamic perspective calls it "اعمار الارض". This idea, as much as it is inspiring, as much as it is frightening. The need to invent suddenly is changed into a "must". I must invent something..I must make a change. Everybody has to make a change..even an insignificant change, you can't just be a burden on everyone else.

I need an invention that would make my life an added value. I need an invention to feel that I have used all the brain power and senses that God has given me to the fullest. I need an invention to give others hope that change is possible. I need an invention..I think I will be obsessed by this idea for a while..until of course I actually invent something.